Sue and Will leave the principal's office to find Rachel waiting outside. Sue gives her the evil eye and storms off. Rachel apologizes to Will, but he's mad at her for lying to him and for making it so that no parents will let their kids join the Glee Club. He hands her the list of pre-approved songs. Rachel: "What's a luft-balloon?" Only the best kind of balloon -- the kind that exterminates all life in a nuclear firestorm. Commercials.
In the teacher's lounge, Emma eats her lunch, polishing each grape one at a time. Ken approaches her and slides two tickets to Tulipalooza across the table. He's inviting her to attend the tulip festival at the Columbus convention center. She thanks him for the thought, but claims she can't go due to her clearly made-up asthma. Ken asks her what she's doing, chasing after a married man. He tells her that he doesn't know much about relationships. "Most of mine are short and flame out once the sex goes." So, about ten seconds after the woman sees you naked? Notwithstanding his lack of relationship knowledge, he knows that Emma shouldn't want to be Will's rebound girl. Ken claims to be a good man who can provide for her, and tells her that she could do a lot worse than him and is unlikely to do much better in Lima. And with that, he hikes up his gym shorts and walks away.
Auditorium. Rachel picks out notes on a piano for Finn to sing. He belts out a note and proclaims, in his best short-bus manner, that it was good. He hits the next note up, and he's less certain of that one, but Rachel tells him it was good and is the "Holy Grail for a baritenor." He asks for a break, since singing makes him hungry. Fortunately, Rachel is prepared for that, with a picnic spread set out on the stage. As they sit, Rachel asks why he sought out her help, since he did so well at the assembly. He tells her that he wants to be as good as her, and she fishes for compliments by asking if he really thinks she's good. He's no good at spotting the bait however -- he starts out by telling her that when he first joined the club, he noticed that she talked way too much and he was worried he'd find her hiding under his bed. But then he heard her sing, and it "touched something right... here." And with that, he places his hand over the right side of his chest. Rachel reaches out and moves his hand to the left, noting that's where his heart is. He notes that his heart is beating really hard, and then tells her how cool she is. She offers him a drink -- virgin cosmos, served in plastic cups that are (in Finn's words) just like the cups they use on airplanes. He notes that she has a little cosmo on her upper lip, and goes to wipe it off. The same piano music from Will and Emma's earlier scene starts plunking away. She tells him that he can kiss her if he wants. And does he want. She lays back on the strategically placed pillow and he lays on top of her and kisses her. And then kisses her again. And then his eyes go wide and he has to resort to imagining running over his mailman as he approaches early arrival. Bent over, with his untucked shirt pulled down over his crotch, he apologizes and asks her not to tell anyone what happened as he limps away. Rachel's mortified, and hangs her head in her hands.













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