Episode Report Card
Demian: A | 1 USERS: A+
It's Madge's World. We Just Lip-Synch To It.

Guidance Office. Emma's obsessively aligning her tape dispenser with her desktop calculator when Sue arrives for some previously scheduled meeting, and long story short, Sue's disconnected Emma's office from the school's PA system because "Arlene" doesn't "deserve The Power Of Madonna" because Emma has "all the sensuality of one of those pandas down at the zoo who refuse to mate." Ha!

Music Room. Rachel's obsessively giving The McKinley Jazz Ensemble a few final instructions when Finn arrives for some previously scheduled rehearsal, and long story short, the two natter away at each other for a very long period of time about their ongoing nonexistent romance until Rachel convinces him to perform a mash-up of "Borderline" and "Open Your Heart" -- two more songs I adore -- and while I said in the recaplet that this number "finally puts a little heat into the Rachel-and-Finn relationship situation," I'm afraid I must note that, upon rewatch (and rewatch and rewatch and rewatch), that statement is no longer true. The best parts of this for me now are The Madonnas Eternal floating through the McKinley halls as the semi-fantasy sequence takes Lea Michele and Cory Monteith from the music room over to the newly constructed school library set and back again. There's a VMA Wedding Dress Madonna cooling her heels next to a Material Girl Madonna in front of the trophy case (go figure), a Nothing Really Matters Madonna (who, sadly, does not appear to be suffering from mercury poisoning), a Lucky Star Madonna (sans Ray-Bans, like, WTF?), a matching pair of Who's That Girl Madonnas (both thoroughly lesbolicious, I might add), a Don't Tell Me Madonna (who I think is actually a dude), and a Holiday Madonna (hate it). But the best Madonna Eternal of all The Madonnas Eternal is the twitchy, PVC-clad, frizzy-haired, insane Human Nature Madonna, because she comes complete with a riding crop, a toy Chihuahua, and a bitchy diva attitude. Love. Her. And... that's all I have to say about that, really. Well, except for the fact that they probably should have gone with Dress You Up Madonna instead of VMA Wedding Dress Madonna, because they perform VMA Wedding Dress Madonna's song later in the episode. Are Rachel and Finn done yet? They are. Good thing Tinkles looks like he's having a ball, I suppose.

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