Episode Report Card
Demian: C+ | Grade It Now!
Proud Mary Keep On Burnin'

There. It passed. And in the end, on top of everything else, Kurt completely and deliberately biffs that high F he'd fought so hard to achieve, and Rachel wins. Well, "wins," but whatever. Poor little damaged baby gay.

Afterwards, out in the hall, Puck ambles over to Quinn to present her with several hundred dollars he swiped from The Handicapable Bus Fund, and ABORTION IN COLUMBUS! To Quinn's credit, after she apologizes for calling Puck a "Lima Loser" all those many episodes ago, she insists they cannot "take money from a friend in a wheelchair." Just then, their Finn in a wheelchair rolls up to give her his first paycheck. Remember that idea Rachel got a few scenes back? It involved wheeling Finn into a restaurant, where she brightly accosted the manager as follows: "You need to hire my friend, Finn. He is clearly handicapable, and refusing to hire him could be seen as discrimination. My dads are gay, and unless you want the full force of The American Civil Liberties Union coming down on you, I'd work something out." Finn will, of course, have to remain in his wheelchair the entire time he's working there, but as he puts it, "Screw it -- it's worth it." So's an ABORTION IN COLUMBUS, Finn. Commercials.

After the break, we join the Glee Club in the auditorium as Puck proudly passes the $1200 they made selling marijuana-laced cupcakes to the McKinley High student body to Mr. Schuester. Self-congratulatory noises abound as Mr. Schue hands the wad of cash over to Artie while suggesting that Artie present it to Principal Figgins himself. Artie agrees, but there's a twist -- while he's grateful they raised so much money for his benefit, he's aware that he'll not be the last wheelchair-bound student at McKinley High, so he'll happily travel to Sectionals in his father's car if it means he can have Figgins use the $1200 to build wheelchair ramps in the auditorium. Everyone applauds the decision, and I'm getting really, really tired with how Very Special Episode this evening's presentation has become. Are they angling for an award from The American Association Of People With Disabilities, or something? Because the whole pot-laced-cupcakes-sold-to-minors subplot might, you know, torpedo that whole idea. Just a thought.

Over in his office, Principal Figgins and Will have decided that Sue Sylvester had a brain tumor for breakfast. How else to explain the fact that she just waltzed into Figgins's office unannounced and wrote the district a check for three new external wheelchair ramps? Not only that, but Sue's unexpected largess means Will's getting his handicapable bus after all. The gentlemen are perplexed.

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