Glory Days

Episode Report Card
Wendola: C- | 597 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Clowns and...uh, Clowns

Sam gets the motel housekeeper to let her into DickClown's motel room while he's not there. She carries a box over to the desk and starts arranging plates of food she's brought, along with a big thank-you card. She doesn't notice someone coming into the room and watching her: it's DickClown, I guess, without his clown makeup. Sam picks up a bottle of wine and goes over to put it in the refrigerator. In the fridge are two severed heads done up in clown makeup; one's got a bright pink wig, the other a bright yellow wig. Clown heads, in Starburst flavors! Sam screams and shuts the door, and then turns around and sees DickClown. "Find what you're looking for?" he asks. He's holding the machete. It's worth noting that there's really not enough room in that fridge for another head, especially one as big as Sam's.

Commercial. Then Sam is trying to explain to DickClown that she brought him some dinner to thank him, and that she was just trying to put the wine in the fridge. DickClown steps closer and then sees his non-clown face in the mirror. "My face," he mutters. Then he frantically starts digging through his suitcase. "My wig...where's my wig?" Sam tries to leave, but he pulls his Scary Clown wig on and yells at her to stop. "Stop looking at me!" he says. "Turn around!" Sam turns her back to him, and he screams at her to get on her knees. Sam's all, "Boo hoo."

Meanwhile, at the police station, they've finally gotten the cop records on DickClown from the Chicago police department. Mike notices that the picture of DickClown without his makeup looks an awful lot like both of the non-clown victims. Rudy opens the Chicago file and reads aloud that DickClown was dismissed after psychiatric evaluations for having survivor's guilt due to the murder of his partner. "Whoa," says Rudy. "He found his partner decapitated." "That's it," says Mike. "He's killing out of guilt -- he's killing himself." They still don't know why Rufus the Clown Clone was killed, but Mike theorizes that he was The Clown That Knew Too Much. They decide to go to the motel....

...where DickClown has just finished putting on his Scary Clown makeup and Sam is still kneeling there waiting to get all killed. "That's better. Now, where was I?" he says. His machete clangs as he steps closer. Sam's like, "Please don't kill me," and she keeps kneeling there sniffling all pathetic, and finally she feels a hand on her shoulder and she completely loses her shit and screams and crawls across the floor, but it turns out that it's just the motel housekeeper; DickClown went off somewhere. That fast? Dude must have a unicycle.

Glory Days

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