Glory Days
The Devil Made Me Do It

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Demons and Dorothys

Rudy goes back to the police station planning to search Robbie's house and bring in Robbie, but Ma McNeil is already there. "I did it!" she snivels. "I hated what she was doing to him!" Rudy doesn't buy her story and think she's confessing to protect Robbie. "Come on! I'm confessing!" she whines. Nobody cares.

Sam drags Mitzi to the diner to talk to Hazel. Mitzi thinks things haven't been right between her and Hazel. Hazel thinks it would be better if they apologized. Mitzi thinks it would be even better if Hazel apologized. Hazel thinks she's been apologizing for seven years. Mitzi thinks Hazel should thank her for being nice to her at the audition. Hazel doesn't think so. Mitzi thinks Hazel's a big skank. Hazel thinks it'll be a cold day in hell before she apologizes to Mitzi. Mitzi is played by an actress who played uptight moms in about seventeen different movies, and Hazel is played by an actress who played a whore in Whore, so none of this is really a big surprise.

Police station. Ellie and the deputy found a special hydraulic pump in Robbie's bedroom that explains how Robbie got his bed to move. Ellie demonstrates how the pump works by sitting on a chair rigged with the device; she jiggles around attractively on the jumpy chair. "Looks like fun. Can I hop on?" says Mike. Shut up, Mike. The deputy reports that they checked at the video store, and Robbie rented The Exorcist five times in the last two months. Plus they found a Halloween CD that Robbie apparently played during his "episodes," which explains why the sound effects were so freaking cheesy. "Well, the kid went through a lot of trouble to set up a murder, didn't he?" says Rudy. "No he didn't -- I did," says a voice behind them. It's Robeelzebub. "Robbie?" asks Mike. "Robbie isn't here any more -- haven't you figured it out yet?" says Robeelzebub sarcastically. Wow, the Prince of Darkness talks just like Denis Leary: who knew? He sits in the interview room and diabolically eats fried chicken; outside, Mike, Ellie, and Rudy try to figure out what the hell is going on. They think maybe he's trying to protect his mom, or cop an insanity plea, or something. Mom still insists that she killed the piano teacher, but Rudy lets her go; I'm totally confused, but whatever.

They get Robeelzebub in the confession room. There are all sorts of dorky forced-perspective carnival-funhouse DemonCam effects: Robeelzebub sits at the end of the longest table in the world! Look ye upon the distorted, ponderous, bulbous forehead of Robeelzebub! Behold, with the single light source placed below Robeelzebub's face, the nostrils of evil!!! Ellie tells him that, so far, he's failed to prove that he's possessed. "We're going to have to ask you to show us more," says Ellie. "Mmm...that would be...far too vulgar a display of power," says Robeelzebub mincingly. Ellie points out that he's quoting The Exorcist. "Give us something only a demon would possibly know," says Ellie. "And something Robbie wouldn't," adds Rudy. "Hmm, so be it," says Robeelzebub. "So be it?" I'm thinking Robeelzebub has gone to one too many Renaissance fairs.

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Glory Days

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