Dan protests G taking Milo away and off this show where a baby clearly cannot be, but she points out that he's not actually Dan's kid, so when fuckin' Vanessa materializes, since it's been five minutes, Dan can sadly tell her that yes, Milo's going home. Hopefully to live with Inspektor Pilot in Boston, where kids who don't matter on this show go to not matter some more.
Lily finds Chuck and apologizes as usual for Rufus's horrible behavior, as usual, and once again we get the catharsis without actually getting the catharsis: She explained to her halfwit husband how his daughter explained to her about the thing that happened four years ago, told him yet one more time that she's put the past in the past and wants to move on -- and did, approximately four years ago -- and Rufus once again looked at his lack of a paycheck and acquiesced, presumably with an option to throw another impotent fit, whenever the mood strikes, about any subject at all.
"I love you, Charles." The smile on his face, like a little boy: All it takes every time is Lily Bass -- who's seen more darkness in him than Blair, who's seen the way he lived and the way he was raised and always liked him just a little bit more than the rest of the kids, who still loves him at least as much as Blair ever could -- to put Charles and Charlie and Chuck in the same room, and give them the strength to look at each other. Every time, that fucking smile, like he's surprised whenever anybody could possibly. I'll keep watching this show as long as they keep making it.
"And if Eva is everything you say she is, I think she will too." Of course, Ivva is out on the street bothering random drivers with her blather, and he can clearly see her. She's not feeling it, because she thinks that him putting her off in front of Rufus and Eric Squad meant her nightmare was coming true, or that any words that come out of his mouth are like actually true. "I should've told you about my past, but I couldn't risk losing you," he says, and she's like, "You're fucked either way, because I'm leaving, so go for it: Who the hell are you, Chuck Bass?"
GG loves it because all she wants is trouble and truth. Blair runs into Charlotte Ronson and they kiss-kiss and Chuck appears, having told. "Apparently you met Ivva," he says with a heaping helping of snark and just a little affection. "Told you to come home. Never said it was gonna be easy." He's sad, because she left him after all, having told. Blair's not nice. "She lasted two days. I'm impressed," she says, about to press her advantage, but behind her is Ivva, coming back, coming in, and his face lights up again. It doesn't really matter where the redemption comes from or who sees it or who understands it. It's all just a story we're telling ourselves anyway. "It was good to see you, Blair," he says distractedly, but mostly kindly. And he makes his way away.