Gossip Girl
All The Pretty Sources

Episode Report Card
admin: A+ | 1 USERS: A+
Hung Up On Somebody That You Used
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

GG, remarkably lucid this week: "A shower is supposed to make you feel fresh and clean, but on the Upper East Side, they're where I get the most dirt. And B's bridal shower tonight promises to be an absolutely filthy affair!"

However, two people have been left out of this little affair: Charles and Daniel. Why, however will they cope?


Chuck is walking Monkey, wearing his Humphrey black studded collar -- Monkey, silly, not Chuck! -- when those two mini-me's representing the GG audience appear. They are getting both older and weirder-looking, as expected. It's weird to see them on this 2.0 version of the story, artifacts of a more heightened and symbolic atmosphere.

Bitches: "Honestly, a mutt? No wonder Blair chose Louis over you. Totally right call, btdubs, because you are so the opposite of royalty. Still, how royally miffed are you that you weren't even invited to the shower tonight?"

Chuck threatens to unleash Monkey on them, but I think it's more his bitchy call-out -- "I should warn you, he's trained to go after fake Prada" -- that scares them off. You know it's gonna get Chucky when he starts tossing around sub-Joan Rivers shit like that.


Dan, reading: "As for number two? In high school, D got left off the list because no one knew who he was. Now it's because they know too well. Looks like Lonelyboy needs to change his name to Banished Boy..."
Rufus & Lily: (Laugh at him, in his very face, because he is a grown man whining about this inconsequential shit.)
Dan: "Thanks for the support!"
Lily: "Um, at least they're still talking about you. If they weren't, I'd start worrying. At least, that's what I tell Serena when she starts with this bullshit."
Dan: "[Needless, pained exposition about how his book is a failure.]"
Rufus: "But the rest of the book tour went better, right?"
Dan: "I certainly was not shirking my responsibilities, resulting directly in the failure of a venture I claim to care utterly about, and lying to you about it. If that's what you mean."

Cousin Peepers comes crawling out of Jenny's old room, looking like something that could be the mess that is Jenny.

Cousin Peepers, recently fired: "Gnngh."
Dan: "Hey, are you okay?"
Cousin Peepers, retiring back to her fake room: "Bleargh."
Lily: "Ugh. I guess I should talk to her. I hope she's taking her meds."
Rufus: "I can't believe we [blah blah exposition, they agreed to throw the shower but won't be at the shower for some reason]."
Dan: "I think I'll pass on watching you guys set up for a party that I'm not invited to. In case you were wondering whether absolutely everything was about me."

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19Next

Gossip Girl




Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP