Blair kind of throws a shit-fit right in Louis's face about being a chauffeur, but he's super gracious like French people always are, and Serena tries to get her to class her shit up: "He's charming, handsome, and loves Manet. We make our own fairy tales. Let's go." Blair sits in the front seat with the driver, acts like a dick about it, and they head off into the night for what I'm sure is going to be a hell entirely of Blair's devising.

Eleanor accessorizes Lily with a nameplate reading "Lily Bass Humphrey," so people will know she once mattered. Rufus doesn't even have the balls anymore to be pissed about this, and says that, as a former rockstar, he wants to stick around for all the champagne and models. I'm not sure what's sadder there, the "rock star" or the "used to be" that preceded it.

The subject somehow changes to how Rufus hopes that dead Chuck is dead, while Lily just finds the whole disappearance is mysterious and intriguing. "Apparently he went to Prague in May, checked into his usual suite at the Mandarin, and never checked out. His credit card charges are very un-Charles-like: Second-class train tickets, prepaid cell phones." She points out that he is a part of the family and Rufus makes some point that exists only in his mind that he doesn't accept Chuck as part of his family.

Eleanor runs up and blowsy as usual starts in on how she doesn't even know why Chuck and Blair broke up, which leads to legitimate eye-woggling between the Bass-Humphries, and then Lily tells Eleanor about how Serena's going to Columbia, which Eleanor just loves, because she likes to be the one to tell Blair the really awful shit that undermines her basic operations. Then she introduces Juliet to Willy Wong, because Juliet is here volunteering, as she does every year, or at least that's her story.

While that same French band from earlier sings about what a bitch Blair is, she tries and fails not to ruin everything. The boys are telling a very bro story about how Jean Michel got thrown out of a casino this one time, for wearing jeans, and Blair has this sort of shrill, grand mal classi freakout that's sort of amazing to behold.

"Sure, but enforcing strict standards of dress is essential for maintaining the decorum of an event! Besides, it's tradition! Men's formalwear hasn't changed hardly in over a hundred years! And it's not just a symbol of class! Owning a tuxedo shows the world that a man has enough means to marry and provide a FUTURE FOR HIS FAMILY!"