Eleanor runs up and blowsy as usual starts in on how she doesn't even know why Chuck and Blair broke up, which leads to legitimate eye-woggling between the Bass-Humphries, and then Lily tells Eleanor about how Serena's going to Columbia, which Eleanor just loves, because she likes to be the one to tell Blair the really awful shit that undermines her basic operations. Then she introduces Juliet to Willy Wong, because Juliet is here volunteering, as she does every year, or at least that's her story.
While that same French band from earlier sings about what a bitch Blair is, she tries and fails not to ruin everything. The boys are telling a very bro story about how Jean Michel got thrown out of a casino this one time, for wearing jeans, and Blair has this sort of shrill, grand mal classi freakout that's sort of amazing to behold.
"Sure, but enforcing strict standards of dress is essential for maintaining the decorum of an event! Besides, it's tradition! Men's formalwear hasn't changed hardly in over a hundred years! And it's not just a symbol of class! Owning a tuxedo shows the world that a man has enough means to marry and provide a FUTURE FOR HIS FAMILY!"
By the end everybody's staring at her, and luckily Eleanor calls right then, so to be fair they are at a luncheon and it's dinnertime in Paris. Why is Eleanor calling? Just to be the first to tell her about Columbia. That's the entire conversation: "So what if Serena always gets the prince and I get the pauper? Being jealous of her is totally Constance, and I've moved on," says Blair, and immediately Eleanor screams, "SHE GOT INTO COLUMBIA!" and hangs up and runs off into the night with a crossbow and a smirk.
Juliet is just pleased as punch to be working the old FNO planning luncheon, talking to various fashion people I don't care about and won't matter in a year anyway, and Nate shows up to look over Chuck's paperwork -- because of his gift for forensic accounting -- so they get to be super cute together some more.
In Paris, Serena has made friends with Lou Doillon, a fashion person I care very much about, but that just adds to Blair's total rage boner.
Awesomely, Georgina shows up at the luncheon at this moment, just strides right on up in their business and produces the heir in front of everybody. I wish she could somehow also interrupt the Parisian dinner, which, it would stretch her powers of evil but I think she could do it. Nate tries to get her away from the fashion people and she doesn't care, just laughs him off, and he confuses everybody more when he asks if Dan knows she's there. Dan calls right then and he's like, "I thought you went on a walk!" and she's like, "Yeah motherfucker, we walked to Manhattan!" and he finally hears the crazy shoe drop.