The cops demand ID from Jenny, but of course she's fourteen so she has none. They press a bit harder, and finally she explodes with lies! "My name is Blair Waldorf. This is my mother's shop, her name is Eleanor. I left my jacket here earlier, I mean... Which irritates my mother to no end, and I completely forgot about the alarm..." She tells them they can't call to confirm this, because Mom's in Paris until Thursday, but turns the cute up full force: "It's six hours ahead, if you want to call! She's gonna be so angry..." The cops suggest that perhaps they cannot abandon a fourteen-year-old girl to her own devices with no way to validate her story, but she offers to close up the shop in front of them, with her set of keys. The cops are befuddled! Team Jenny!
Dan and Serena walk back downtown discussing how ironically depressing the Ostroff Center is, and how much they love their younger siblings, and S decides to finally lay some truth on Lonelyboy. "Worry looks cute on you. But look, I've seen Jenny in action, and my hunch is she doesn't let herself get pushed into anything she doesn't want to do." Dan has his doubts that Jenny's actual idea of a great Friday night is "painting her face full of makeup and stumbling out to a hip bar in high heels and hanging out with a bunch of drunk Wall Streeters who don't even care if she has a name." S is like, "Not the point, and not her idea. But it's okay for her to want to be friends with the people she goes to school with." Dan, adorably: "Why? I'm not." Which is like the point of this entire show: "Yeah, and if you made half the effort she did, maybe we would've met a long time ago." Point. "Then so maybe you would've kissed me already." Aww! So perfect! I love it. Of course, Dan has to spin some retarded metaphor about how they've finally found "common ground" by standing basically in the gutter, with no five-stars or town cars or dirty pool halls or bad '80s music, as though as long as they don't go anywhere or do anything or look at anybody but each other they'll be fine, which is okay but not really optimal, given that honestly the only weirdness in this world is the weirdness that you mix up with your own special recipe, and nobody ever really gets to be safe in that kind of secret Nowheresville for the rest of their lives, but eventually he kisses her. Eventually.
Rufus, hilariously, sits in Chez Humphrey brooding in the dark and listening to old Lincoln Hawk CDs, but: at this point shouldn't he be brooding about Allison? It would be awesome if actually the cause of the Lily/Allison split was Rufus, dogging them, and the song were actually about Allison the whole time, because Lily will go crazy about that, but I don't know. Don't read too much into it. Maybe he's just feeling nostalgic and not actually brooding. Whatever brings the Lily and Rufus scenes, man. And I hope Allison shows up soon too, just because.