Blair and Cameron joke around about the horrible art at the art party, is it better or worse than the Ikea fixture, Nate goes to Columbia but never attends classes because why would he on this show, and finally Cameron cuts the bullshit. "Blair, do you want to make that guy who showed up jealous or what? I saw you two... You want to prove to him you're over him, ready to move on? Just have to take the plunge. Show him the past is the past." She totally likes him! He totally likes her! And his cunning words mean both things at once, that the act is the thing and the thing is the act, that by taking the plunge she'll actually be taking the plunge, if you see what I mean, and that's the show I know. They agree to kiss, and even as she's leaning up you can tell she'll never go through with it.

Vanessa has had it and she's going back to her cave in Central Park. Dan hilariously reminds her how Willa's obviously untrustworthy ("Keep in mind, she carries around lighter fluid") but Vanessa has the facts on her side. Dan whines about how he didn't know about the original piece thing, and that anyway Willa's going to fix it now, which Vanessa points out is not a great way to start in a prestigious program like this. Which I don't really think she's being unreasonable about that: Small, competitive group like that -- especially of notoriously shitty folks like writers and theatre people -- you don't want an iffy application thing constantly coming up.

Dan somehow makes this all about him and how she is ruining his life and taking away the one thing -- shades of Blair and Serena -- that he "wanted more than anything." For at least two episodes, he's wanted this more than anything! Vanessa falls into a bit of a quagmire at this point, because she says that she "explained" it -- her secretly submitting herself to the program he hasn't shut up about all season -- and he says that no, she "justified" it, which is bitchy and weird but also sort of right... Except for, just like how Dan didn't know he was accusing her of quasi-plagiarism when he whined to Willa, Vanessa didn't know there was only one spot for an NYU student when she submitted herself. So they're both wrong, which means -- in a stable, healthy relationship -- it's a wash and neither of them are wrong.

But so then Dan has to get very wrong by elliptically pulling some major Humphrey bullshit: "You said yourself that if you knew there'd only been one spot, you wouldn't have applied." Um, fuck you? How dare you even go there? Vanessa's not dumb, she totally calls him out for that one, and he points out -- also valid -- that he's reacting to a situation, which he's allowed to do. Once again stymied by their shared internal suckiness, they find themselves at a freshman year impasse, and Vanessa bounces.