"You're an improbable person... And so am I. We have that in common. Also a contempt for humanity, an inability to love and be loved, insatiable ambition -- and talent. We deserve each other... And you realize and you agree how completely you belong to me?"
Blair's honest befuddlement at that one is hilarious and delightful. She smacks at the air like a codfish for awhile and finally just goes, "Love me?" Always, he says, and kisses her pursed, weirded-out lips before leaving. She's so freaking funny. When he's gone, she dials Vanessa, who deliberates for just a moment before ignoring the call -- how could Blair possibly make this even worse? -- and B shrugs. "Oh well. I tried!"
Meanwhile, Gabriela approaches Vanessa in PRADA and quite nearly apologizes for being so monstrous. They laugh about what a dick she was being, and she promises to keep an open mind about the school, and "everything." Vanessa, instead of explaining herself and refusing to apologize for her life, just says that her speech will explain why NYU is the school for her, and they hug -- still laughing about what a beast Gabriela is. This is how Drano bombs happen, people.
Dan has burnt the chicken, especially for Olivia Burke. Which is fine by her, because now she wants to go to the Dinner, with a weird fake laugh and some threats about her "best behavior," and then taking off in the ugly asymmetrical purple dress -- whom will it claim next? -- before he can think about it. But this is dumb, because if he just thought she didn't want to go, and now she does want to go, then why make that face? Because it's Dan. Probably he assumes that she is a drug dealer or wants to run a Ponzi scheme on Lily and Rufus again, because he hates women.
"The atmosphere is very Macbeth-ish... What has, or is about to, happen?"
A remix of "Gentle Rain," by the always swanky/always creepy Astrud Gilberto is the perfect way to make you feel super endangered, even in the National Arts Club. Vanessa looks hellish, and scoots past the mean face of Blair, who leaves some hot girly boy standing there and follows Vanessa to hiss at her about the National Arts Club and how it's so Age Of Innocence, and then draws out the reveal about how Josh gave her the toast. Which has now belonged to everybody. It's the Nate of toasts, just like Nate is the toast of breakfast foods. And of course, Blair looks vintage fantastic -- And if she's spared, where's the hateful purple dress? -- like an Aubrey Beardsley print, all the better for when Vanessa crumbles into a little ball and starts begging and making that damned face... There she goes.