No! Chuck was merely coming to apologize, and Dan isn't hiding from Serena but in fact driving Blair's getaway car! Finally, the chauffeur gets the girl! For five seconds, most likely, but still: That part was wonderful.
Gossip Girl: "Weddings mark one of the largest transitions you can make in your life. They are a new beginning, the next step in a person's evolution. But evolving is a tricky thing. You can't change without changing the world around you. And not everyone might see your transformation the same way you do. But if you can make it through and truly be reborn... Then maybe so can I. So beginning today, the past is just a prologue. It all starts from here."
Who caught the bouquet? Gossip Girl, of course. Who is typing the words above? Gossip Girl, naturally. And to whom do we refer? Why, Mrs. Georgina Sparks-Husband! You know, like how that makes total sense.
I'm so sure Georgina is actually Gossip Girl; Dan and Blair probably don't even make it out of the city; Serena continues to wallow in her own bathos; Louis joins the circus or becomes a serial killer or turns out to be Lord Marcus in a Prince Louis mask or whatever nonsensical character change is fated for him; somebody maybe uploaded the video that wasn't actually Georgina, which is a snoozy mystery that couldn't matter less; and Nate learns the tricky ins and outs of Lola's serotonin receptors.
JACOB CLIFTON is a freelance writer and critic based in Austin, Texas. He currently recaps Gossip Girl, The Good Wife, Pretty Little Liars and True Blood for TWoP. Jacob can be found online at jacobclifton.com, on Twitter, and on Facebook. IRL work appears in BenBella's SmartPop series of anthologies, most recently A Friday Night Lights Companion and Fringe Science.