Gossip Girl
G.G.

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: D | 1 USERS: B+
YOU GRADE IT
Sale Of The Century

Georgie: "Clearly you need an expert. You were trying to go after Blair. She's not the weak link. It's always the man."
(True enough.)
Georgie: "Now give me Chuck's altarboy uniform and we'll get this shit done."
Cavallia: "How can you be so sure you can pull this off?"
Georgie: "Jesus owes me one."
(True, again, enough.)

BREAKFAST AFTERMATH

Lola: "I am everywhere at once suddenly! Despite nobody running into me the entire time a person was right here in the city impersonating me and hanging out with my famous family members who are constantly in the paper!"
Nate: "Yeah, I don't recognize you."
Lola: "You're Nate Archibald. I'm surprised you found your way to this brunch."
Nate: "Anyway, we're going to hook up."
Lola: "Yeah. Probably."

Nate: "Dan! I'm so happy to see you! I guess I got over my weird, misplaced, come-and-go aggression of late."
Dan: "Yeah, I..."
Nate: "-- I have fallen in love with a caterer."
Dan: "Or we could talk about that."
Nate: "Maybe that's my issue, paying too much attention to the wrong girls and not enough to the right ones!"
Dan, and truer words: "Well, if we're listing your issues, I'm not sure I'd start with that one."
Nate: "I know, right? How weird that Blair is getting married, because we used to be getting married."

Dan: "It's like it happened on an entirely different television show, unrelated to this one in any way beyond the title and actors involved."

Nate: "...And now I don't have a date to said wedding. Relationships!"
Dan: "And yet you're constantly walking into relationships that you know are doomed, with old women who are paying you for sexual favors. I don't think you're allowed to bitch about this."
Nate: "I will forget what I am saying in five minutes anyway."
Dan: "I too will do that."
Nate: "Maybe I should just admit that there's no such thing as an honest relationship, and stop looking."
Dan: "What is this, the movie Gigi?"
Nate: "No, just the cynical viewpoint of this show."

Nate: "Hey, you know the world is really a mess when the most honest person we know is Chuck Bass!"
Dan: "Sometimes when a thing is not demonstrably true -- or within the realm of possibility -- but still dictated by the storyline, it helps to have a random character just blatantly say it out loud. That way, the audience knows to adjust their understanding of basic shit. It's especially good when it's tremendously notable for being an incredibly awkward segue."
Nate: "You're right. We should go make sure that Chuck doesn't do anything untrustworthy, because of how one second ago I said he was the most trustworthy person, and you agreed with me."

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Gossip Girl

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