VERSAILLES?

I don't know. It's fun to pretend it's Versailles, anyway, given Blair's travesty of a life, and there's like a castle and a horse. Good enough for me.

Eleanor: "You're still not good enough, no matter what you do!"
Blair: "Thanks, Mom! I will do more fashion now."
Jean-Pierre: "I am your PR Director and also gay BFF, and I am at your beck and call. My name is Jean-Pierre, if you can believe it. Now! Let us do some fashion!"

Nate: "Blair! Serena is missing!"
Blair: "Someone we know is missing, Jean-Pierre! More importantly, do you like my chapeau?"
Jean-Pierre: "It would look better on a True Friend. I am booking you a flight to find her."
Blair: "Without a pretty gay dude bossing me around and making my decisions for me, I would have no identity whatsoever."

INSIDE II: THE INSIDENING

Georgina: "Did you really fuck Serena on the bar at the Campbell apartment? Sounds remarkably like the night we had a threesome on a sex tape and then killed a man."
Dan: "Now that you mention it, she did manage to tape us doing it."
Georgina: "So that'll probably come up at some point. Oh, your phone is ringing because it's the same time in every time zone on this show."

Georgina: "Hello?"
Blair: "Your voice sounds particularly masculine today, Dan. Anyway, Serena has been missing for months and we're all simultaneously noticing. I'm afraid the Witches got to her again, with their magickal invocations and ether-soaked Carnivale masques."
Georgina, hanging up: "Dan, change of plans. You wanna see a dead body?"

HO TRAIN FLASHBACK

Serena: (ODing.)
Random Chick: "Oh my God, that's disgusting!"
Blair & Chuck: [(Fucking.)]
Random Chick: "Seriously, it's discouraging seeing what such a lovely woman will do to herself..."
Blair & Chuck: [(Fucking.)]
Random Chick: "I just wish somebody would step in and help her. But really, that would still be denying her the agency of her actions, continuing the infantilizing objectification that caused such a horrible thing to happen!"
Blair & Chuck: [(Fucking.)]
Random Chick: "Hopefully this final season will enable her to reach past the roadblocks of her past and find a new life where she's able to rely on herself to make good decisions, because she has self-respect and the support of those around her, instead of merely relying on the last sentence the last person said to her, because she's too stupid to think for herself."
Blair & Chuck: [(Fucking.)]