Gossip Girl
Gone Maybe Gone

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: C+ | 2 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Hobo Humpin' Upstate Babe

Eli Manning: "I'm going to call Lily for a quick sitrep. She cares a little more than me and a little less than Blair. Plus, she can read. That could be an asset."
January Jones: "I'm professional enough to at least try and fake a real emotion at this point. After three years of nothing to work with, I'm willing to just pretend and wait it out."
Robert DeNiro: "I am better than this. Just wanted you all to know."
Daniel Craig: "Nobody on earth has ever talked like this in the history of mouths. But at least I'm dressed like an organ-grinder's monkey."
Louise Lasser: "Should have left well enough alone. Guess I'll go rooting around for drugs."

Step One: Nate calls Lily for a quick sitrep.
Step Two: Georgina fucks a priest for literally no reason.
Step Three: Blair and Dan track down Serena.

Dan: "Why would I do that? I hate the bitch, I don't care what's happening here."
Blair: Slaps the shit out of him.
Dan: "I owe you nothing. You chose Chuck over me, therefore I hope Serena dies."

New Step Three: Blair tracks down Serena to make her feel good about herself.
(Secret Step Three: Dan tracks down Serena to make her feel awful about herself.)

And break!

BASS APT

Amira: "I'm in here, Chuck. Staring at the same spot of the wall you always stare at, drinking your same liquor. Hating your same dad."
Bart: "It is I! Bart Bass! Back from the dead and lurking in apartments!"
Amira: "You're really cutting into my staring time here. State your business."
Bart: "You must not tell Chuck the thing that you don't know what it is."
Amira: "Okay. For ten million dollars, I will pretend not to know the thing you're talking about, which I don't know what it is."
Bart: "Done. I am the best negotiator of America!"

WEDDING

Barry Watson: "Everything okay, Sabrina? You seem nervous about this function."
Sabrina: "I am nervous about this function we are holding at your second home. I want it to be perfect for various reasons."
Barry Watson: "So do I, young lady I've been dating for less than four months. Listen, I just wanted to say a quick list of things I love about you, like your name Sabrina and how you go to Vassar and that you are from Wisconsin."
Sabrina: "Those are my most cherished attributes too. Besides these puppies, I mean."

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Gossip Girl

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