Gossip Girl
Gone With The Will

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1 USERS: A+
The Son That Went Missing

Blair lights some candles and turns down the dimmer on her romantic non-romantic dinner, wearing a HOT dress. You guys, did you know Blair has really lovely breasts? Serena's breasts : Marilyn Monroe :: Blair's breasts : Norma Jean Baker. Chuck texts her that he's "working" and she is very sad; meanwhile the streetlights are whirling drunkenly outside Jack's limo, and Chuck is kissing girls and telling stories and acting like a drunk ass, and Jack is loving it. And for a show in which fully half the storylines right now are about made-up fake incest, it feels a little weird that Chuck and Jack are basically all about having orgies with prostitutes and all of this, because that actually is a lot more like incest than this show's idea about incest, which is not anything like incest. Which still doesn't explain why it's so titillating, but I think Jack's hotness is the secret answer to that one. "Looks like Chuck Bass made his choice. But careful, Bass. Now that you're a big fish, there are a lot more sharks in this pond."

L: I just noticed that you are a drama queen with the emotional maturity of a houseplant, who has been holding me hostage by the short hairs of my own conflicting feelings about twenty-year-old decisions I made that were totally correct.
R: Eventually we will hear the hoofbeats of reindeer on the roof of this hotel, and then you will realize that you are a dick for not believing in the Great Pumpkin.
L: Oh I'm realizing something all right. Which is that I'm glad Bart died in a bloody car accident, because if I'd actually left his ass for you I'd be feeling like a serious fuckup right about now.
R: Do you see my fingers? How they are crossed? Doesn't that mean anything to you?
L: Do you see this one finger I'm holding up?

Lawyer Guy: Remember how I told you the parents weren't interested?
R: Yeah, you were just kidding, I remember that.
Lawyer Guy: Well no, I wasn't, but anyway they just said that you should suck it, as I mentioned before, but now twice as hard, and also stop fucking harassing them.
R: Whatever. Lil, they don't want to meet with us.
R: Look, stop yelling. This is all happening because you're a bad person.
L: No, this is all happening because it's what was obviously going to happen, which I've been telling you for the last fifty episodes.
R: Because you are an asshole.
L: Being right doesn't make me an asshole. Indulging your constant BS does, though.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23Next

Gossip Girl




Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP