Gossip Girl
I Am Number Nine

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 2 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
This Is My Idea Of Fun

"You can change! Do you remember this morning when I asked you about Blair? I was trying to provoke you. But you chose something else, something better. You chose to let go. Continue down that road, and I'll bet you'll find some peace."

Chuck, once again, is so completely thrown by her pop psych read on things that he decides to change his life. Just like the last three episodes. Maybe she really is a genius. Too bad she's closing down her practice.

S BY S

Diana: "So you got fired, huh? Can I get you to blog on my website now?"
Serena: "No! I told you that I think blogs are evil."
Diana: "Right, and like I keep saying, I am not about attacking people online and spreading rumors. You keep saying that's what it's about, and I keep saying it's not."
Serena: "Then what it is about?"
Diana: "Taking Gossip Girl down."
Serena, verbatim: "Everyone reads her, and whether they admit it or not, everyone posts. This city is addicted to her!"
Diana: "Only because she writes about people like you. Cut out the middleman."
Serena: "I don't know. Reading and writing and stuff."
Diana: "Serena, you damnable fool. This is a chance to have your own voice. To stop the lies, and finally control your own image. Aren't you tired of swimming in Gossip Girl's fishbowl?"

There is a time when those words would have thrilled my very soul, because that used to be the heart of the show. But now, it just seems like another way for Serena to fuck herself over somehow. She'll be well-meaning and doofy, and then she'll say something or write something, or Diana will make her do a thing she doesn't think is right, and Dan will scream at her, and the whole thing will start over again. Expectations low. And no, you can't fool me with your beautiful Lana Del Rey song. We are on high alert right now.

SPECTATOR

Nate: "No more games. No more secrets. Either we're in this for the world to see, or we end this right here."
Diana: "Right. That's the point in the episode where this always happens. Cool."

WALDORF

Chuck shows up to apologize to Blair. It's fairly well acted and it's a neat little kernel of a scene, pretty well-written honestly, but here's the thing: When you do a therapy story, it's one of two things.

One, the one I like, is a very rare thing in a show, where a crazy person becomes sane and then the story is about how that doesn't actually solve anything, because problems still happen. This is why I got and stayed obsessed with Meredith Grey after years of hating her, it's why Starbuck was awesome toward the end of her story, and it's the only thing I really liked about Serenity. As a card-carrying member of the formerly walking wounded, I get a lot out of those stories.

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Gossip Girl

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