Gossip Girl

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1783 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
All You Need Is Kill

Eric gets Jenny cornered and says he's not about gameplay, he just wants to tell Jenny to fucking cut it out, and she acts all compartmental once again and tells him it's no big deal. And besides, he shouldn't even be playing anymore, he's already dead. He's like, "Where did my photo go?" Little does he know that Culkin Face has already taken that photo worldwide, and will somehow in a few hours have narrowed it down -- maybe the Eastern Bloc Racist Joke Doorman's Assoc.? -- to the Palace, even though they're at the Waldorfs' building. (Unless, NYCers let me know, they're both on the same block, in which case a whole lot of the timespace fuckery on this show starts to make sense.)

Nate eludes Serena by stepping behind a glass door that opens in, so she can't get to him, and he apologizes for flaking all day, but only after she apologizes for her pretending not to care about his birthday. He finally cracks and says that "something really messed up happened" to Jenny last week, and S -- where have you been? -- asks why Little J would come to him about that. Um, because that's what she does every time? He spazzes out Nate style and goes, "Only because I was involved!" Which is hilarious, as she appropriately responds, "Well, that's not making me feel any better?" He tells her about the drugging and near-raping, and S is of course devastated, even though she herself has been roofied more times than we can count and usually takes it in stride -- although not as in stride as Jenny, because nobody ever would besides her -- and Nate assures her that Jenny is fine, except for this malingering PTSD that... Only shows up when he wants to spend time with his hot girlfriend. Still not connecting those dots.

Of course S plays right into his Prince Charming narrative about how he's a sterling solid big brother-friend -- Awesome: "Can I kiss you before I kill you?" -- and then Jenny shows up to push the metaphor once again, snatching the photo off Serena's back (which I wondered about all episode and eventually assumed was just because the breasts' power might be diminished that close to Polaroid technology, like how Superboy had to keep his Kryptonite in a lead-lined box) and goes, "Gotcha! Watch your back!" I love how every line from or near Jenny is a double entendre, with either the show commenting on her ("Poor Nate!") or using Jenny to comment on the episode. She's always been a liminal and a mirroring figure, and especially in this episode she's just used brilliantly in both ways, while still maintaining what is a powerful crazy all her own.

Gossip Girl

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