If you care, and marginally so you probably do care more, Chuck has built an entire room around a Whores of Venice theme for Raina where she can have her favorite food from her favorite Venice bar on this holiest of all love nights. "When I care about someone, I'm not afraid to show it," he says, and she smiles. "When I think a thing, I say it, because I am always honest and you always know where I stand. I'm just built that way."

Outside the lovers' nest, Daniel is staring at them yearning for something he can't speak aloud, and then Lily shows up and asks him where Charles is, and he points weakly at the door, which is closing on their passion, and then doubles over with a pain so deep and intense it could only be assuaged by Ben showing up at this party and having a big dumb fight with Serena van der Woodsen and then hobbling back to DUMBO in need of a drinking buddy and a firm shoulder to cry on.

Serena's answers to the interview questions: Mystique, maybe. The Louboutin Biancas she wears.

And then also, who is her Valentine? Blair helpfully swings the camera around to show Ben Donovan working as a cater waiter -- "Don't be embarrassed, S. It's okay to date below the line. Madonna and Julia Roberts paved the way for girls like you!" -- and then everybody yells at everybody else because everybody lies to everybody else. Ben thought Serena was staying home, Serena thought Ben was working a case with the SVU, Blair thought S was helping with the Raina situation, and Raina thought B was honest about helping her relationship with Chuck. Ben runs away because he's ashamed that S put lying words in his mouth, and Serena just stares blankly trying to figure out why the field hockey stick of Blair Waldorf has once again struck her on the buttocks.

Lily goes barging into the Venetian Fantasy and Chuck yells at her for awhile about how she's the reason Russell hates everything and she never told them about that, and then escalates into just straight-up calling her an ignorant slut. "We both know you're a socialite, not a businesswoman. You traded musicians for titans of industry, upgraded from a tour bus to a corporate jet..."

Raina looks like she's about this close to barfing, it's all very awful and intense. Lily responds, awesomely, "I've done nothing but try to salvage that company for you. I stepped in so Jack wouldn't take it away, and every day since, I have fought for your future. If we had stuck together on this, we would've won... Charles, you've lost, and I'm not talking about your battle with Thorpe." Chuck spits in her face and says she never would have even adopted him but for to get Bass Ind., which is freaky hateful and crazy and frankly should have given them all pause, and then Lily is just like, "You are the worst and whatever happens next, you walked into it with your eyes open."