Gossip Girl

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1515 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Clone High

Jenny shows up with Penelope's dress and gets a facefull of attitude from the Plastics -- Hazel is looking remarkably hot this week -- but Penny changes her tune when Jenny tells her about the fight with Vanessa. Right then, Isabel appears in a -- you heard me! -- silver toga dress with a single knotted strap, looking amazing... But it's also unlined and see-through. The Plastics laugh at Iz and crack sort of lame jokes about it for a bit, and Jenny randomly (randomly) goes, "Oh, what do you guys think Vanessa's wearing to the Ball?" Who knows why she asked this, raise your hand. I have no idea. Penelope gets a sneaky look on her face and asks Jenny if the unlined dress doesn't look a bit like one of hers. Jenny sniffs at that, and Penelope's like, "Um, get crucial." Jenny puts it together and they all grin evilly and Jenny's like, "I cannot believe how horrible I am about to be, but you're right: I totally am going to give that see-through dress to Vanessa Abrams and pretend I made it." GG is like, "This. Is going to be awesome."

Serena's doing her nails while B runs around her bedroom in a mustard-colored Blair shirt, yakking at her about the Chuck thing. "Chuck is in for the shock of his life. I have depths he'll never plumb, but I know every inch of his wafer-thin soul." Serena points out that it's hard to see somebody with your ex, presumably even if they're not a monstrous cave creature from the assy depths of Satan's playground, and fills B in on their new plans to Snowflake it up as a group. Serena says her weirdest thing of the episode: "I found out she tends to... Extend herself to guys on the first date," like, who says that, and B doesn't understand why Serena cares. "We're friends, so shouldn't I, like, give him a heads-up or something?" B sympathizes with the pain of every high school boy who got "caught off-guard" by magical first-date sex, and S agrees with that rational point. Not that she will avoid "warning" him about it anyway, because she really is just like her mother, but she will know that she is being stupid when she does it, which is the only way you should ever do stupid things: eyes open!

Gossip Girl

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