Gossip Girl

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
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Clone High

Chuck asks his father not to go to this Miami business meeting, given the situation with Lily, and Bart whisper-yells about how the whole Thanksgiving debacle was his fault anyway, for giving Eric the files, and removes his affection and approval as swiftly as he gave it, the night of Charlie Trout. Which saddens and shames Chuck, because he was A) just excited about the novelty of showing his best little brother the safe and B) values disclosure almost as much as he values this family unit, which we talked about before with how of course he and Vanessa get along, because they both like telling secrets and having things out on the table, because he's on the other side of the burlesque from B or even Serena.

Chuck's priorities have been shifting every since the wedding, and I honestly think that as much as he yearns for Bart's love, he is just as committed to Lily and Serena and Eric, to their actual family actually working, and that's the real reason he cracked the safe. Because all the surveillance and shit never bothered him -- you need a sense of shame to operate in a shame culture, or else it's just information -- he had no actual way of knowing how freaked out the blondes would get about it. So he managed to break, like, the only three promises he's ever made in his life, and hurt the only people besides Nate that he is openly allowed to love honestly. And then and only then, on top of these things, he pissed off his Dad.

Jenny shows up with Penelope's dress and gets a facefull of attitude from the Plastics -- Hazel is looking remarkably hot this week -- but Penny changes her tune when Jenny tells her about the fight with Vanessa. Right then, Isabel appears in a -- you heard me! -- silver toga dress with a single knotted strap, looking amazing... But it's also unlined and see-through. The Plastics laugh at Iz and crack sort of lame jokes about it for a bit, and Jenny randomly (randomly) goes, "Oh, what do you guys think Vanessa's wearing to the Ball?" Who knows why she asked this, raise your hand. I have no idea. Penelope gets a sneaky look on her face and asks Jenny if the unlined dress doesn't look a bit like one of hers. Jenny sniffs at that, and Penelope's like, "Um, get crucial." Jenny puts it together and they all grin evilly and Jenny's like, "I cannot believe how horrible I am about to be, but you're right: I totally am going to give that see-through dress to Vanessa Abrams and pretend I made it." GG is like, "This. Is going to be awesome."

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Gossip Girl

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