Serena: "Fuckin'... Do you assholes want to come to Thanksgiving, or are we just going to die here?"
UNDISCLOSED LOCATION #2
Nate: "Blair, whatever you're going through with Chuck I promise you it's worse from where I'm sitting. The smell alone, you should be glad you can't get in that building. He argues with Monkey, who is a dog. He has given up on defeating Laius entirely. He didn't even bust a smile when I told him about Bruce Caplan dying."
Blair: "...His dentist?"
Nate: "That's Brad Kaplan, you idiot. This is the Bass business manager that is not the other guy. The one that I did coke with in the living room and then it got weird."
Blair: "So Sheik Hassan and Whatever Caplan Guy both died in suspicious circumstances? And they're the only people who knew about the Sudanese Embargo deal? How did we miss that?"
Nate: "Um, because it wasn't true before this actual scene?"
Blair: "Retroactive continuity! Deal with it. It is the new status quo. Literally."
Nate: "Maybe he would buck up if we solved the crime, or at least got Lily back on our side, but..."
Blair: "-- I have a novel idea! All we need to do is break into Bart's computer. As though that has never been tried multiple times, including this very plotline."
Dan: "This is the saddest shit I have ever seen. And I was in a threesome with Vanessa Abrams and Hilary Duff."
Rufus: "Don't feel sorry for me, I got big plans! I'm going to be a hanger-on at Lisa Loeb's charity benefit tonight! The charity is: me."
Dan: "Come to PRADA for a Lily-free dinner of expensive rich-people food, like you're used to."
Rufus: "No way! Lisa Loeb's thing's gonna be a hormone-free potluck! ...Or at least it will be, once I get there."
Rufus: "Yeah, Jenny told me you and Serena were back together. On the Skype. You know, we Humphrey Men and those Rhodes Women..."
Dan: "Just shut up. Just shut your face."
Seriously. When I see him now, it's like I can't even hear words. Just a foghorn. Just a bleating, bitching, impoverished, subaltern lighthouse, beyond which is just nothing. No dragons, no serpents, no inhabitants of any kind. Illuminating a glass-smooth sea that never moves and smells like burnt waffle, bounded by gray beaches of blunt shale and disappointed cigarette butts. Just mmmrrrrrrrrrehhhhhh.