Georgina Sparks appears in the Bass suite, getting all snappy with him about how nice the Empire is -- "For the Upper West Side" -- and saying she's not even angry about the time he and Blair got her kidnapped and sent to Belarus, because she's in real trouble this time. "The Russians don't mess around. It's really cold there, and there's, like, barely any designer jeans, and the average citizen drinks about thirty-eight pints of pure alcohol a year!" Russians got mad style, but the other things are true. Anyway, Chuck isn't having it even a little bit, so he tells her to leave or be thrown out. She goes. She is totally Catherine Earnshaw in this episode, just haunting everybody and acting weird all the time.

Dan and Serena wake up in bed together, goddammit. Apparently, though, all they did was drink a bottle of wine and kiss for ten minutes, and the rest was just talking. Also, S fell asleep on his arm, but she's coyote pretty so he couldn't move it. Thus neither of them noted Jenny arriving, with her name scribbled on her coffee, to take a picture of them together and email it to GG. Why? Because she is a bitch, essentially, and because she will never give up trying to break them up, because without trying to suck Serena's entire life out through her eyeballs, what is she?

So those two crazy kids, they wake up thinking life is basically normal: They love Nate, and Dan loves Vanessa, and they decide to keep this non-event a secret. There's one gorgeous moment at the door where Serena literally goes, "Call me if you... Need anything?" like she can't figure out what you say in this circumstance, and it's brilliant, but then he accidentally kisses her near her mouth, and he starts stuttering, and it's all very troublesome. For once GG is completely cogent: