Chuck, who is looking fine as hell this episode, gets bitchy with Serena when she shows up looking for Nate, whom he says "knows who he loves and what he wants." Unless S can say the same, he says, she needs to be honest and so forth. "Courage, ma soeur," says he. Then Nate and Serena have a really dumb fight that they keep having, which is that he shouldn't have called the cops on her father for poisoning her mother because it's not Nate's call what is against the law: It is Serena's. However, she would like to make things work and "go back to being us," which I'm not sure what that means but I'm guessing it happens on the kitchen floor.
Blair arrives at DUMBO, and Jenny tells her to bring it on. "When are you gonna get it? For three years, you've tried to worm your way into our world, but you will never be a part of it. No matter what you do. This isn't copycat dressing at Constance or dumping dairy on your best friend to prove a point. Nate and Serena? That's mythic. You don't mess with that and survive. You're hurting people I love. You're hurting people you love." That's the part that gets her, because it's as close as possible to drawing a Venn diagram about how crazy she is becoming.
"Nate loves Serena, Dan loves Vanessa -- God knows why -- and Chuck loves me. But you, Jenny? No one loves you, except your daddy, and after what you pulled yesterday, who knows if that's even true anymore?" I didn't entirely buy the Jesus Hates You thing that drove Georgie crazy that time with Poppy, but as a warm up for this, that's cool. Because I do totally believe that this little speech would take Jenny all the way to Crazytown, of which she is already the foursquare mayor. Downstairs, Dan is worshipping at the fecund altar that is Dorota's distended belly. "That's so beautiful, I can't believe it! The miracle of life growing inside of you!" My God, this kid.
But when Blair punches him, it's not for that: It's for fucking around with Nate and Serena's relationship. Blair knows, through her feral extrasensory powers, that they at least kissed, and are leaving that part out. Then suddenly the dumbest thing happens, wherein suddenly Blair looks at the skyline and sees the Empire State Building, and falls back in love with Chuck Bass. In the middle of a sentence: "Signs are for the religious, the superstitious and the lower class. I don't believe in them and neither should you... Damn you, Chuck Bass. Damn you to hell!" Lame. I mean, the whole plot hinges around Blair being a crazy person, and that this whole Affair To Remember thing is not actually romantic but just Chuck's correct idea about what Blair thinks is romantic. So I can see her suddenly falling face-first into it like she never saw it coming. But the way it's done here, very unconvincing. Maybe it's just the line reading. Anyway, she sends Cameron away after he's said his one line of the entire episode, and she's headed for the Bridge, but then Dorota goes into labor. Which is just so Dorota. "Dorota's water might not be the only thing breaking tonight," says GG, which is also so Dorota.