Serena wonders, as B would if their situations were reversed, which is what they now are, if that's why she's driving herself to the airport, but Blair explains that Chuck wanted to see his Dad's post-honeymoon arrival before they left. "Besides, we're taking the helicopter to Teterboro. I have to sit in the jump seat so that I can... tell the pilot if I have any thoughts on his flying." Blair, I love you. Don't ever change. Only Blair Waldorf would combat fear of flying by assuming that, in case of emergency, she'd be better off in the jump seat so she can land it herself. S asks what it'll take to get Blair to relax, and B totally moans in a disgusting, hilarious voice, "Chuuuuuck." Ha! Serena claps her hands over her suddenly bleeding ears, and then puts her hands on Blair's face. They smile sweetly at each other. "You gonna be okay? Alone, all summer, without your best friend, who always gets you out of trouble?" Serena's looking forward to staying out of trouble, and admits she hasn't talked to Dan since the wedding. "It's for the best. For him, for me. I'm fine." She gives a fake laugh, and worried B strokes her arm.

Chuck and Nate are gabbing on phone like always, about how Chuck wanted to see his father in love, and if he wants to see a man in love then he should, per Nate, look in the mirror, and like: I'm not making this up. That's actually what their conversation is like. You think I'm exaggerating but I'm really not. Nate says the whole Tuscan thing is a big deal, and Chuck puts him off and asks if Nate's going to be spending the summer in Brooklyn being dragged to fucking Matthew Barney movies and McSweeney's readings, and Nate's like, "Oh yeah, turns out I'm indifferent to Vanessa." Who knew?

Chuck, feigning shock, is all, "Nathaniel! What happened with you and Punky Brewster?" Which is such an excellent comparison to make, because as we all know, Punky Brewster was found living on the streets when her mother abandoned her in a department store, which is exactly what I would do if Vanessa were my child, and as far as we know is what happened to Vanessa anyway. Unless he's talking about the cartoon, because now that you mention it Dan does bear a certain resemblance to a magical fuzzy leprechaun that tells you the moral of the story every eleven minutes even when you didn't ask and don't effing care.