Announcer: "Sheikh Hassan's daughter is just leaving the field. Avoid the steaming divot!"
Chuck: "Lily, I have to go talk to that little girl for a second."
Lily: "Nothing odd about that, no sir."
Chuck: "Can I buy your horse? Just kidding, I gotta yell at you about your dad for a minute."
HO PARTY
Georgina: "Pick your ho, Humphrey. I don't have all day."
Dan: "This just isn't me! I respect women, just as long as they do exactly what I say at all times!"
Georgina: "Give me a goddamn break."
WEIRD SEGUE
Weird because I think there's an actual, intentional comparison here between Dan literally shopping for poon and Chuck discussing the buying of horses with various people. That sounds like too much credit, though.
Chuck: "[Random Bruce Wayne talk.]"
Iman: "That's so funny you would say all those words, because Lady Alexander was my childhood horse and Bart bought her from me instead of sending her to the glue factory and then randomly had a painting painted of her and then also bought a million other horses from my father, a Sheik."
Chuck: "[Still not putting it together.]"
Bart, suddenly: "I have appeared!"
Iman: "Uncle Bart! I was just telling your son about your weird predilection for having famous portraits done of horses."
RHODES HARD & PUT AWAY WET
Sage: "Who is that astonishingly beautiful WASP over there?"
Serena: "That's my mom. Let's go meet her."
Sage: "Can I call her Grandma?"
Serena: "Well, it would kill her, but... No. Gotta say no."
Lily: "Serena, who's this? Your much older mentor?"
Serena: "No, this is my stepdaughter-to-be."
Lily: "Bitch, she's older than you are. What the hell."
Serena: "Think it through..."
Lily: "...So you must be dating a much older, rich guy. Got it. Well done, sweetie."
Lily: "Did you ever think maybe you have a Daddy Complex? And that I am to blame?"
Serena: "No, you jackass. That never once occurred to me."
Nate and Steven continue to bro out, reaching heretofore unknown -- "Wait, so you really played basketball at Duke?" -- levels of flesh-crawling weirdness.
Serena: "Nate, get off him. Jesus."
Steven: "Well, we are in love."
Lily: "Holy shit. You're that Steven Spence?"
Steven: "Do I know you?"
Lily: "Your dick does, jerk."













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