Gossip Girl
Gossip Girl

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 167 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Spread Like A Sailor

LET'S JUST TOSS BLAIR IN THERE TOO

Blair: "What's the haps? And where have I been this whole time? Although thank God, since I'm even more poorly written than usual in this episode."
Chuck: "The Sheik is dead, my dad's a dick, and that little girl doesn't know shit."
Blair: "A little girl I can terrorize? Be right back."

Blair: "LITTLE GIRL. HELP CHUCK OR ELSE."
Iman: "Um, with what? He just threatened me with rape under the guise of asking horse questions, nothing I can't handle but certainly not something I can help him with."
Blair: "[Shitty racist joke.] Uncle Bart had your horses killed, okay? He doesn't give a shit. Now help Chuck."
Iman: "Okay, if I 'help' him, which you still haven't explained, will you stop bugging me? That look in your eyes gives a girl a chill."

UWS

Steven: "So about that sex..."
Serena: "I'm sorry, but it's gonna take me more than a car ride to forget the fact that you slept with my mother."
Steven: "Um, really?"
Serena: "No. Of course not."

EMPIRE

Iman: "Apparently they just let little girls wander into the penthouse here."
Chuck: "Baby, they have express orders to do just that whenever the opportunity presents itself."
Iman: "Anyway, as has been obvious since at least the beginning of this episode, the reason your dad bought all those horses is because the US has an embargo against the Sudan and you can't buy oil directly."
Chuck: "Explain in excruciating detail. This is the kind of thing your average Gossip Girl viewer really wants to hear all about."

THE BANK

Fake Banker, or "Fanker," In Bart Bass's Employ: "Gosh, these artificially inflated numbers seem much more inflated than last time."
Nate: "I did some artificial inflating of them. Bart Bass told me to."
Fanker: "Spoiler alert, secretly he also told me to do this."
Nate: "Do what?"
Fanker: "Approve your loan or whatever was going on."
Nate: "Hurrah!"

Gossip Girl

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP