Gossip Girl
Prêt-à-Poor J

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Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
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Jenny comes screaming out of Max's building, bitching at Nate. "What are you talking about? You're lucky I showed up when I did! That was a bad scene, Jenny..." She shouts that it wasn't: "We were dancing around in our underwear, not making a porno..." He says that's step two, and with Max I think he might have a point, but Agnes is the one you have to watch out for. I'm just picturing Jenny giving Max a hotshot of coke by accident and absconding off to Waverly Prep to atone. "Not ever! I would never let myself get in a situation like that. All right? I know what I'm doing, Nate." The thing that Nate has to say to that is impossible to say without sounding bossy, so it sounds creepy and bossy, but he ends on a good note: "That guy was taking advantage of you." If anybody would know...

Jenny, just about over everyone on earth telling her what to fucking do, just straight-up starts screaming: "Okay, you are not my father and you are not my brother, so why do you care so much?" Nate breathes: "Because." She looks up at him, trying to figure it out, and then she does. Something clicks, and she can't believe it's true. She leans in and kisses him, then pulls back, scared. He sighs, like, Oh, hell, and she misreads him again, and starts to run away, but she was right the first time: he pulls her in and kisses her, and holds her tight. The camera goes bananas, and even Gossip Girl doesn't see a downside: "I'll confess: every once in a while, a girl craves her fairytale ending. So sleep tight, kiddies. It seems like Little J got her Happily Ever After..."

So take all that you know and stuff it in a hole
And in ten thousand years someone will take you home

Set the dark on fire

That. Was amazing. Low death count, there was talking good, Mini Cooper's finally here and just about crazy as hell, Blair and Chuck actually managed to have an entire conversation about what we talk about when we talk about love without anybody getting caught in the crossfire, Dan pretty much totally redeemed himself until next time, Vanessa continues to earn her horrible fingers-crossed grisly murder, Chuck definitively proved himself a non-sociopath by acting like one, Bart and Lily didn't do any of that scary paranoid Pasadena crap, Rufus apparently discovered a clone of himself that Serena is now going to pursue for the first time in her life, Jenny and Nate finally found the only two worthwhile people in the entire city not named Eric van der Woodsen, and me? I just love you madly. And I'm not afraid to say so. XOXO.

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Gossip Girl

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