Gossip Girl
Prêt-à-Poor J

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
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Jenny's hemming some ever-so-Chico's clown pants on a ridiculously short model named Agnes, better known as Kaitlin Cooper, who calls her "dude" for the first of a hundred times and compliments her dress. Jenny thanks her "on behalf of Eleanor Waldorf designs" and Agnes says she recognizes the top of Jenny's head. That's exactly how Chuck recognizes Nate! "I think I recognize your feet," Jenny agrees, and they laugh insanely. Jenny notices the Bloomingdale's buyers arriving, and excuses herself to warn Eleanor. "Should I take notes, or what do you...?" Eleanor gives her a confused look and Jenny reminds her that she was told she could sit in. "Well, not today!" She needs those stupid clown pants done! She runs over and kiss-kisses the guy, and takes him off to show him some boring old-lady crap. If Jenny didn't already look like she'd been run over by a stagecoach, she would look that way now.

Luckily Nate comes running in -- sadly, clothed -- to give her the forgotten sketchbook, and they giggle and shine at each other some more without actually saying anything, and he finally takes off. Agnes is all over it, teasing Jenny, and there's a pretty good abrupt ending to the scene with Jenny tish-toshing Agnes's intimations of a love connection, and ribbing her about it. "He thinks of me like a little sister!" Yeah," Agnes says, "A little sister he'd like to do." Hard to say that grody line in a cute way, but somehow Agnes pulls it off.

In the courtyard between classes, Dan spots Serena and runs over to ask how "AP Economics" is treating her, which I love Serena exactly enough to believe, and she cracks a funny joke about how Isabel cut short a "rousing debate about inflation versus liquidity" by calling her godfather Warren Buffett. They sit down and talk about how they tried to be friends and Dan fucked it up for the fifteenth time but he wants to try again, which is remarkably similar to the many conversations they had about how they kept trying to date and Dan kept fucking it up but really wanting to "try" in some unknown fashion that involved no accountability or effort. However, since Dan is absolutely amazing in this episode the first time ever, we won't speak of that again. "We were young and stupid then!" Serena says, about like yesterday or the day before. "Now we're older and wiser..."

S and Lonelyboy are getting their dimples on as usual when Blair shows up out of nowhere, shoving S down on the bench to sit next to her, breathlessly exclaiming, "You have to help me destroy Chuck Bass!" Dan jumps up at her approach, like a hot potato, and Blair thanks him for fucking off, but Serena tells him to wait. "If you're having a problem with Chuck, then a man's perspective could be helpful." 1) How? And 2) What man? "Just because you two are making a doomed attempt at being friends doesn't mean I have to play the enabler," B snots, but S begs her with that sad face. "Well," Dan says calmly, "If you're plotting against Chuck Bass, then I'm ... sure I can think of something." Blair's like, Fucking you want in on this? Check it out. "Fine. I have an itch that only Chuck can scratch and he won't oblige unless I tell him I love him."

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Gossip Girl




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