She looks like shit. I love ya, Carol, but you look busted like Jenny snorted Agnes right now. Best get that crack money soon because you are looking like Pete Fairman with no ambulance on the way.

(Old-school Pete Fairman joke, what! I killed a person!)

PRADA

Carol arrives while CeCe talks about how she wishes feathered hair were still in fashion. But I mean, when you're a Rhodes Woman that's two times dumb because A) Serena and B) Time travel.

Carol and Lily talk at each other in a very Gossip Girl way, which it in itself odd because her line -- off something CeCe says about preferring a certain type of flower -- comes after she gets off the elevator, meaning she overheard their conversation from inside the elevator, on a show where you can literally carry on conversations with people perched on your shoulder and they won't hear you:

Dialogue She Can't Hear: "[Mumble hoo-hoo muted trombone.]"
Carol, bearing flowers: "...How about Lilies of the Valley!? I totally heard you."
(It was like that. But the serve is returned...)
Lily: "...More like Valley Of The Dolls, now that you're here."

See? Totally Gossip Girl. Not a lick of sense. None of this scene makes sense. But it goes to a place that is like Heaven by the end.

Dumb Carol, verbatim: "I am here to reconstruct, not self-destruct. I promise!"
CeCe: "You are not invited to my party. What do you want?"
Carol: "Crack money. Also, me and my fake daughter are back together and we love each other and she invited me to the party."
Lily, secretly: "I am going to slap that girl. Her whole point is we hate you."
CeCe: "If you two bitches don't get along at this party, I will Blair the shit out of you. Don't pull focus. Otherwise, fine."
Carol: "Suck it, Lily."

WALDORF (VDW)

Ivy: "Tell me all about your amazing date with a guy I certainly haven't met!"
Serena: "We spent the entire night together, but -- as with the many times this show has told this exact same lie -- we were just talking and exploring New York's fecund and varied blessings at all hours. Just walking around in our bras and being totally chaste. It's important because I'm about twenty-five, except in this one situation. Where I am a virgin. Juliet's brother and cousin never both tagged this, nohow. Just this constant walking."