Central Park, where Blair is wowing at her mother's ability to be okay with the surprise gayness of the season. Instead of pointing out that her capacity for forbearance is implicit in the red cape-cloak from Mongo that's threatening to consume her body and soul, Eleanor's like, "What would you have me do? Scream? Turn our daughter into a giant bulimic sociopath? Act like a scorned wife? I've had years to get used to your dad's total gayness." Harold and Roman chitter-chat about old-man gay stuff, and Blair's like, "Roman doesn't even know how to ice-skate! Take him away with you! Drop him off at a nail salon on your way to the meeting!" Eleanor explains that she is not to be arsed about getting Roman away from Blair, cutely, because she has to "mentally prepare" for her big meeting with the CEO of an Underpants Company. Everytime they drop the name of this Underpants Company, take a drink. At the end of the night, you too will find that prancing around with your boobs hanging out and marrying Seal seems like a good idea. Roman's tiny gay French ears perk up: "[Underpants Company]?" (And you would not be particularly faulted for thinking that this is a total diss, because in fact it's super dumb to think that this show, in a real economy, would come anywhere close to Underpants Company, because they have Underpants Company in every mall, large and small, and it's kind of the Forever 21 of underpants, so there's no real cachet. But just as you know that when Paula Abdul takes a refreshing sip of Cola Product she's really drinking moonshine, you know that when they say Underpants Company, they're really talking about something like La Petite Coquette. Or whatever is flossy-flossy, I admit I just picked that name out of a copy of Forbes; I don't claim to know anything about Lady Underpants beyond what Oscar De La Hoya wore to my last Christmas party.) Eleanor explains to Roman that she's designing quote "a line of retro-chic sleepwear and lingerie," which sounds cute, as long as retro means like fifty years, and not a hundred. Blair says she's very much looking forward to the samples, because apparently she and Serena are both planning on flouncing around the Xmas tree looking like hookers tomorrow morning, and then totally tosses Roman at her mother like a tiny gay French grenade: "Why don't you tell Roman all about it?"
Episode Report CardJacob Clifton: A+ | 1408 USERS: B
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