Dorota's intense cleavage and wildly adorable beribboned periwinkle hat come running up to Blair and Serena, informing them that The Sonic Youths are stuck in traffic. Serena characteristically tells her it's fine, with a sweet smile, but Blair prickily shouts after her -- "But next time, remember Mr. Chuck has a chopper!" -- before Serena asks after Carter, whom Blair innocently assures her is coming, and they walk past Bree and Nate, with a characteristically nasty look from Blair, and he notices her staring around the crowd, as though she's looking for someone, in her characteristically fucking hideous dress, and they walk past Jenny, in seriously gorgeous swamp-thing makeup, climbing characteristically about the greatness of the wedding all over Eric, who can't even handle it, and they walk past kids playing, and we end on Chuck, who nods slightly to Bree as she holds his gaze and raises a glass.
"Carter is more than fashionably late," Blair hisses at him, "And it better be because he's lost his keys or he got hit by a pedicab, and not because of something you did." Chuck tells her to trust him: "Serena's life will be much better without Carter, which is why I offered him an easy way out." Meanwhile, not to be outdone, Blair stares at her current Carter: "I don't care what Bree Buckley told you. Carter's a new man with Serena, and this is her mother's wedding. He won't miss it." Chuck assures her they'll find out, and heads off for a canapé. Blair's top is amazing, I can't even describe it. It's abstract but modern, with these wood-like textured swirls all over it. Chuck does a lot with patterns but I can't think of a more textile or graphic piece of clothing on this show. Well, some of Serena's weirder things, but this isn't high-fashion weird, it's MOMA weird. It's like something award-winning out of a magazine for graphic designers, like an event invitation that doubles as sustainable apparel or whatever.
"I nearly choked!" Dan squeals at Vanessa on the phone: "She shoved her tongue right down my throat! I did some great acting, though. Totally pulled it off." Vanessa, looking resplendent in yellow, hails a cab with her dumb-looking hair. "It'll be worth it when you see them finally happily married." She tells him not to worry; he does not obey.
Jenny watches Lily in the mirror, putting on her dress. It's gorgeous; she fucks it up with some nouvelle turquoise drop earrings that fan out like a peacock's tail. "You know, Lily, it wasn't easy for me when my parents split up." (A Rhodes shadow crosses Lily's face, like, For real we're doing this now? Shit.) "And, uh, it was even harder when I realized my dad was in love with someone else. But the truth is, I've... I've never seen him happier than he is with you." Lily smiles at Jenny through the mirror, and turns as Jenny caresses her arm sweetly; she kisses her cheek. Jenny's excitement carries her right over Lily's sudden tension: "I can't wait for you to hear his vows! They're all about your future together, and... I don't want to spoil them, but they're really beautiful!" Lily's scared, Jenny's still manic. "Okay, I'm gonna go, but you look amazing. And I'll see you out there."