Diana: "I can make GG 3.0 the most popular website in town!"
Serena: "Look, I'm a woman with values. Maybe you've not heard, but I don't approve of people using Gossip Girl to destroy people. In fact, I was already about to give it back, once I finish using it to destroy my sister-cousin."
Diana: "Meet me at my office after lunch. I'll be the woman having an explosive conversation, in full view, out in the middle of the hallway, right outside Nate's office, where anybody can hear me."
THAT AWFUL ANEMIC COUPLE BEING CREEPS SOME MORE
Plus those dorks Dan and Blair are talking to. Zing!
Creeps: "We thought, what better way to show we're the new intelligensia than to invite similar a-holes to our house and then lecture them on whatever thing we last heard about on NPR as though we are experts."
Dair: "And they willingly sit still for this?"
Creeps: "They come in droves, it's a real racket. Turns out everybody likes to feel smart without actually doing anything to further their own knowledge."
Dan: "Might we involve a tightly structured PowerPoint presentation as part of this unending nightmare?"
Blair: "How au courant!"
Creeps: "Now you're getting it!"
Dan: "Wow, they really are the same as us. I feel good about that."
Blair: "I guess we're holding a salon. I guess that's actually happening."
Nate: "Serena. Are we fighting?"
Serena: "I can't remember."
Nate: "Let's say... No."
Serena: "Great! Good talking to you, friend."
Nate: "Wait, I needed to exposit to you that Lola thinks you're Gossip Girl."
Serena: "How perfectly insipid. I guess she's just insecure. And irrelevant."
SIX CENTIMETRES AWAY
Diana: "Jack, it's Diana. Payne? From that time I was mysteriously at the hospital after Chuck and Blair fled her engagement and ended up in a car accident and miscarriage, which sent Blair into a mental fugue state from which she is only now recovering... Yes, that's me. Listen..."
Serena: "So much information going in my earhole. Such a generous serving. Must sit down and process. And then possibly fuck things up for everybody like always."