Gossip Girl
The Backup Dan

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
Runaway Snide

Blair and Louis get in their limo and leave in front of a bunch of paparazzi; Blair has the gall to pretend that any of this isn't exactly what she wanted from the jump.

GOSSIP GIRL HQ

Phillip: "Wait, you're posting a video of Blair with Louis? What about the photo you took of the whole NJBC at that hotel?"
Georgina: "No, she's back with Louis now so that wouldn't ruin anything. But I still know the answer to the question on absolutely nobody's mind! Who sent that video to me!"
Phillip: "But you can't reveal your source, because nobody would submit tips to GG!"
Georgina: "That line of dialogue makes literally no sense. That's come up like twice already this season, and was in fact a pivotal plotpoint in a previous episode that eventually went nowhere."
Phillip: "So wait, are you really Gossip Girl?"
Georgina: "No, of course not. That wouldn't make any sense at all."

OUTSIDE

Chuck: "I still don't get it. She's acting crazy. Do you think maybe she has that thing where the bugs that live in cats' stomachs has taken over her brain?"
Serena: "Toxoplasmosis? No, I think she's just regular crazy."

Chuck & Serena: "Wait, if you didn't send the video to Gossip Girl, then who did? That is the person who was trying to save her life. Or ruin it. Or move the plot forward another inch."

Dan: "I guess it was me. That makes sense, actually."

NEXT WEEK

Blair: "Daniel Humphrey, let's make our relationship work!"
Just: Kidding.

JACOB CLIFTON is a freelance writer and critic based in Austin, Texas. He currently recaps Gossip Girl, The Good Wife, Pretty Little Liars and True Blood for TWoP. Jacob can be found online at jacobclifton.com, on Twitter, and on Facebook. IRL work appears in BenBella's SmartPop series of anthologies, most recently A Friday Night Lights Companion and Fringe Science.

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Gossip Girl

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