Gossip Girl
The Backup Dan

Episode Report Card
admin: A+ | Grade It Now!
Runaway Snide

Airplane Lady: "Let me see if I can find a random flight to the Dominican Republic, hang on."
Blair: "What is the holdup, Humphrey? People are starting to stare at me. Probably I'm standing here in a giant wedding dress with my hair looking drowned. Pretty soon somebody is going to take note!"
Dan: "Okay, the lady is just getting you a ticket. Stop yelling at me."
Blair: "You don't understand! The Grimaldis will pull strings in the DR to keep me from getting a divorce!"
Dan: "And yet the lady is getting you a ticket, so stop yelling at me."
Gawkers: "Is that Princess Blair? Damn, her hair looks drowned."
Blair: "IT BEGINS!"

Blair: "Little girl, I'm going to be a bitch to you until you trade clothes with me."
Girl: "Uh, that doesn't sound fun at all. Hey, aren't you the recently married Princess of Monaco? That would explain the dress and how you're Blair Waldorf, a local celebrity that is constantly on Gossip Girl."
Blair & Dan: "Unconvincingly enough, no."
Girl: "On closer inspection, no. Blair Waldorf's hair has bounce and volume. And the Prince is about ten times hotter than this guy, who is also a local celebrity and yet I don't recognize him."
Dan: "Hey!"
Girl: "Uh, then get a haircut. You look like Oscar Wilde's houseboy."
Blair: "Fuck you, you poor piece of trash. Now, about that favor I asked you..."

Blair: "...So that went well."
Dan: "God, Blair. And it was such a good plan, too."
Blair: "I am not insulted, whatever she may say. Now give me your credit card."
Dan: "No questions asked."
Blair: "They do extend credit to people from Brooklyn, right?"
Dan: "Keep it coming, Waldorf. The thing I most hated about Serena was the way she treated people like a normal human being."

Dan, alone for a moment, takes a call from Serena in a hilariously fake-calm fashion. It is one of the best moments of the entire episode.

Dan: "Oh hey Serena, whazzup? No big deal, just chilling. What do you want?"
Serena: "Dan, I'm SO SORRY I disappeared from that reception, leaving you all alone without me, the love of your life. I have prepared a lie to tell you about why, rather than telling you the truth, for some reason..."
Dan: "--I didn't notice that you were gone, because I don't care. But since you're not at the reception, I'm also going to lie for no reason and say I'm there. Oh, and Blair left. But absolutely not with me."
Serena: "Let's keep lying to each other for no reason as long as it takes Blair to max out your credit card."

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14Next

Gossip Girl




Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP