They talk about how Dan is lying to everybody, like usual, and Blair is lying to everybody, like usual, and maybe Blair and Dan are in love, which they obviously are, and then everybody yells at everybody else for being sneaky and spying on Blair. Serena looks at pictures of Dan and Blair entering their secret love den while holding hands, and such is her delusion that she is just like, "This proof means nothing." I'm holding onto the idea that both Blair and Serena have to pretend Dair isn't happening because if it does, the whole universe comes apart as far as they're both concerned. I just really like that.
Somehow, Serena turns this into an opportunity to give another speech on how amazing she is and how she refuses to be the new Gossip Girl and how knowing facts about people destroys innocent lives and whatever. Finally she's so exercised about it that she shoves her computer at Chuck and Louis and runs off yelling at them, with her hands over her head, about random things.
Bart's and Chuck's and everybody's private detective, Andrew Whatever, calls while Lily's upstairs doing whatever she does up there for months at a time. I love how this same group of like six people is constantly siccing the exact same private detective on each other, like, how amazing must he be at disguises?
Rufus: "Oh, you can't tell me why you're calling Lily? I hope it's not about tracking down Cousin Peepers, because that will make me really mad for reasons that are as nonexistent as they are irritating."
This whole episode Serena has been doing this monologue with herself -- occasionally with input from Nate Archibald -- about her Year-End list of Most things, like, "Most addictive show about desserts" or "Most embarrassing penis in a text message" or whatever. Right down to the actual fucking party has already started and she's still coming up with these bizarre things for this list that never ends and nobody ever responds to her or answers her or pays any attention so she's just chirping these inquisitive little questions, "What is the most amazing transformation of 2011?" and then thinking really hard into space about it.
Facts: The pictures from the wolves' own cameras can't tell you if they were close to enough to quote "run Chuck and Blair's car into the wall." Which, I'm kind of confused now about this part too, because what does that even mean? Is Nate picturing some kind of Road Warrior or Grease II scenario where the motorcycle wolves were actually butting their vehicles into the towncar in order to send it spinning off into the Central Park woods? Because that's not how physics works, by a long shot.