They kiss for a second, and it's great, but then suddenly he remembers that his father is married to a widow who is not a widow. Blair opts out of going -- Where is Rufus these days, even? Somewhere drunkenly offering to tell people his thoughts on the Magnetic Fields if they buy him a microbrew -- on that little field trip, but everybody is very happy, and very beautiful. Even Humphrey's hair has lost a lot of the Pennywise factor.

VAN DER WALDORF

Dorota: "Miss Serena you seem no crazy no more."
Serena: "I guess the intervention worked. I forgot how great this show is when Blair and I are actually interacting. I'm on cloud nine right now, little lady."
Gossip Girl: "Oh, is that right?"

Oh wow, this is nasty. So Gossip Girl -- in long-promised retaliation, of course, as well as amid complaints that she's been too nice to S and B lately -- uploads an artfully censored page from Blair's diary about how she knew Dan was about to give her the three words, and she was freaked out about it. Right, but the kicker is that she claims they were sent by one Serena van der Woodsen, which would have happened right around that time that made no impact on me where he said those three words.

I'm glad it's almost finale, or I'd go Blair on myself trying to figure out when this all went down, but as it is: Right around the time Serena started going crazy, I'd imagine, Blair started getting the wet-eyes from Dan, and Serena took time off from destroying Lola to go after B a little bit. Thanks revoked. But, admittedly, this is good in a different way: The part under black bars, it would seem, includes the information about whom Blair really is in love with... And it's not Dan, I don't think. Blair stares at her computer, and Serena sits at the bottom of the Waldorf stairs, in a beautifully composed shot, feeling like hell. The end.

NEXT WEEK

Chuck gets his ring back from Harry Winston, because Blair is still in love with him. Dan spins out into crazy, and there's a reprise of the Shepherd Wedding Scenario -- we can only hope Serena kills somebody else afterwards -- which causes Blair to come gunning for Serena directly.

On the one hand, their friendship is more important than running through another BS war. But on the other hand, Dan was always going to be the Kryptonite, and this has all been a lovely respite from a very scary storm that I feel like we'd just gotten lulled into thinking would never come. The threats and warnings about this triangle have been going on since the whole Juliet/Damian thing, I mean, it's not a shock.