On the couch, Lily asks Rufus to watch her, make sure she doesn't glut on the egg rolls, or she'll feel guilty later. "Not likely," he whines, and finally she's like "Fucking what, already?" He drops the extra list pages on their dinner tray and she apologizes, slowly chewing and wondering what's going on in his pointy little head. "Let's just pretend like this never happened," he snits. "That's obviously what you wanted." Which, I kind of get his point, which is why would you even play a game if you're just going to cheat? That's confused me since I was a little kid, like, why even bother playing Monopoly or Scrabble or whatever if you're not going to follow the rules? What benefit is there to winning a game, or playing it at all, if you don't play fair?

Rufus says that's why he didn't condense his list, and Lily gives an awesome Come On Dude face: "Your list was a dozen people. How much more condensed could it have been?" Rufus's feelings are hurt in a whole new way, and he obstinately juts out his chin: "I'm not embarrassed about my past," he whines, giving her the whole argument right there: "No. You're just embarrassed about mine." Nice! I swear Lily van der Woodsen could run you over with her car and still make you feel like an ass, I love it. She's so right all the time, even when she's terribly wrong, which is all the time. "When you saw the condensed version, you told me you were relieved." And it was gross! He reconsiders. She drops her food and suggests that maybe it worked after all, and they learned exactly what they needed to know. He stomps off and away without speaking, like any grown adult would do after being called on his total and essential hypocrisy. And I hope she ate the shit out of those eggrolls too.

Nate finds Vanessa, and she gets about halfway out of the moral red: "About before. What I forgot to tell you is... I believe in you, too." He smiles, and she fucks it up just as quickly as she fixed it: "Just a different you." He wonders what to do with that particular bag of bullshit for a second, and then William calls everybody to attention and starts throwing the royal We around willy-nilly.