Aww. She points out that getting this photo is similarly pathetic for him: "Since when does Chuck Bass pay for a partner? The Chuck I knew bribed no one but me." And then all of a sudden the thing is sold: To Serena van der Woodsen, who gives them not one, not two, but three fierce motherfucking looks before swishing her hair around awesomely, doing her gorgeous hip-walk thing she does when she's modeling, and taking off with every ounce of their mojo. Everybody else is gracious enough to let her complete the entire sassy catwalk before getting back to business.
Tragic Mom stands directly in front of a framed photo of Little Edie and exposits the shit out of you, answering questions you didn't even know you had: "1) After your phone call, 2) I got in the car. 3) I came straight to New York. 4) I had Lily's address. 5) The doorman told me about the auction." So that explains it. She tells Scott that she's not there to stop him, but to stand by him, and apologizes for all the lies: It had more to do with dead Andrew than it did with Rooster and Lily St. Regis, and she only acted like, and forced his dad to act like, they were crazed kidnappers because she was bereaved. But now she's fine with it, so whatever. She's like about as interesting as her kid. They hug and are tragic. Somewhere Vanessa's hugging muscles are burning, because if ever there were a tragic hug she deserved to be in the middle of, it's this one.
Georgina is alive with excitement, the whole "racing to an art auction to confront a possible stalker" thing, and Dan asks if her last boyfriend was Batman. (Um, her last boyfriend was Jesus, so kinda.) Things get very concrete and there's not much to say beyond the plot. Dan attacks Rufus with Scott paranoia, and Georgie announces herself to Rufus while paying nonsensical/expository lip service to the fact that they've already met under a different name, and then Dan goes, "He's dangerous!" And Rufus goes, "Dangerous?" And Vanessa appears and goes, "He's not, he just wants to talk to you," and Rufus literally goes, "Talk to me about what?" But of course Vanessa is not fucking going to say anything, so then Scott appears and... Totally lies.
"I haven't told you the truth. My last name is... Rosson. This is my mom." He takes her hand. "I'm your son's brother. Andrew's brother. And I, uh, just really wanted to meet you." GG laughs at Vanessa, whom once again has been screwed out of being part of anything interesting, but honestly: Your cover story is that you engineered a secret life and have been living under another name for the last four months because you just had to get to know the biological father of your dead adopted brother? Thank God it's dumbass Rufus he is telling this inane tale, or we'd see some real fireworks. You know Lily would just grab hell out of his lapels and shake that head at him: "Nuh-uh. What's really going on here? Rufus, I can handle this." Which, speaking of: Between telling her daughter to quit college last week, and letting their kid slip through his guitar-callused fingers this week, I'm starting to think Lily is actually going to kill him.