Gossip Girl
The Princess Dowry

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 13 USERS: D+
YOU GRADE IT
Waking The Dragon

Like I got a pretty crazy email this week from a fan of another show I'm writing about, which has a very short season which is about halfway through, and the guy was like, "Well, you're a jerk for not liking the exact thing I like, and I hope you get fired, and at least I still have hope." And it's like, The show is half over! You already know, there's no hope or not hope. Even if that was the moral victory you seem to think it is, that's still not what's happening. I think what he meant was that the finale could be really neat, and certainly I hope that it is, but that still doesn't actually improve the half of the show you've already... You were there! You know what I mean?

This is why the fooferaw over The Killing was so mystifying to me, because I honestly don't understand this method of watching television, that you would sit through twelve hours of a show and then suddenly be like, "I hated it the whole time! It was not a good show!" because why would you watch twelve hours of a show you don't like? Is it just because it's the buzzed-about show and you want to part of the water cooler conversation? What a dumb reason. And even still, how could a specific turn of events in the finale fix that? Either you like a thing or you don't. It's not about "quality," that's such a nebulous thing to even want to acquire. That's such a silly way to try to label yourself, as a person who watches a particular TV show. Like that says anything about a person at all.

So yes, the string of episodes over the last month has turned me around on this show, and I've loved them -- in a fairly different way -- just as much as anything in the first season, looking at the show on its own post-high school terms, but if the buy-in for the first half of the season is "We have some subpar churning-out of episodes to do in order to increase the pressure for when things finally get interesting," that's not optimal. And that's what this feels like. It's like on a sitcom when they're throwing you a surprise party but in order to keep the secret, they treat you like shit all day. Yes, it's nice to have a party, but did you really have to pretend you hated me all day to get there? You couldn't just hide the broccoli under some mashed potatoes or something?

...Which actually, on reflection, was in fact a storyline this year, so I guess there's that. But as we learned in that episode, all you end up with his hurt feelings and some slut's joint in your mouth.

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Gossip Girl

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