Gossip Girl

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Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
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It's My Party & I'll Roam If I Want To

Jenny swears she was clear about not wanting this, and Serena recasts history in Poppy terms, saying that probably what Jenny meant was that she didn't want a "social fiasco where you planned something and people didn't show up" -- which is of course what sent Serena off on this tangent to begin with, because she was always the hostess of the party even when she and Lily were planning it -- and she wraps up with the huge lie that "all of these people" are here just for Jenny. Which is just patently and patronizingly untrue, as demonstrated by Patrick McMullan -- this utterly famous photographer-friend of Andy Warhol whose pictures of celebrities and Beautiful People basically invented parties -- who Serena calls over by name to take her picture with the birthday girl, and who excitedly asks, "It's a birthday?" Jenny quits that particular scene immediately and Serena stares after her like, Busted.

Jenny runs to the gays for comfort, of course, and Eric's like, "Isn't this just a lovely, intimate family gathering?" Jonathan shows her a monogrammed cocktail napkin ("SUPER SWEET ON THE UPPER EAST"), laughing about how totally Jenny that is, and she snatches it. They realize just how not cool she is with this, and Jenny demands an explanation for this hijacking. Eric points out that most importantly Serena wanted to do something nice for her, and got carried away, but off Jenny's cut-the-crap look also admits that Serena obviously needs to prove she can still throw a great party. Which is what parties are for, I mean, throwing yourself a party is something that is kind of fun, but you can't really go balls-out for yourself the way you can for somebody else, without looking like Blair Waldorf.

But so instead of shoving the gays under one arm and the board games under the other and heading to Denny's or under a bridge or whatever Jenny crap she would have preferred, Jenny gets a crazy Blair look in her eye and texts GG: "RAGER AT THE VDW. COME ONE, COME ALL!" She slips her phone back in her purse with these funny superspy movements, and Eric and Jonathan get scared. Isn't it refreshing to see the whole "mom and dad are gone and things get out of control and somebody breaks a vase" plot rewritten in this way where instead of being surprised by it, it's actually on purpose, and done for shitty reasons? That's nice. That's really Gossip Girl, I think, that self-aware teen-story remix thing. I wish that rule got broken less often on this show than it is, but it's still pretty rare that you get a straight rip-off, and that's fun. I remember this interview going into Season Two of The O.C. where Schwartz was like, "We will never do a lab partner episode. Well, I mean, we're doing that right now actually, but we're not doing it, like, how it always is on TV. We're doing it like the lab partners are the adopted kid and the secret bastard aunt who are attracted to each other and nobody ever figures out whether it counts as incest, but then Adam Brody gives a cute speech about how he's somehow his own grandfather or some shit."

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Gossip Girl

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