Gossip Girl

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
It's My Party & I'll Roam If I Want To

Gabriel, obviously, comes wandering over to Serena with her bags, staring at her with his big weird face and acting like he knows her. "I met you last year, around this time actually. You were with a friend of yours, and you were calling yourself ... Savannah?" Ah, Georgie times. Scary. Poppy runs up with champagne, since it's a private jet, and they officially are introduced while Poppy squeals with excitement, failing to notice that he's taken with Serena and that she's blushing. Man, his face. He looks like a Tim Heidecker character.

Dan calls the fan, and his mom picks up the phone, but is given pause by the area code. "Who does Scott know in Brooklyn?" The dad is revealed, and if you recognized one but not the other it takes both to figure out who they are: the people who lied about Pilot Inspektor, whose name is apparently Scott. The dad answers and tells Dan that Scott can't come to the phone, but his face crumples when Dan tells Mr. Inspektor his name. "He wrote me a letter, so, uh, I guess if he wants to talk, tell him he can... He can give me a call back?" The dad lies and hangs up, and they commence freaking out because, they assume, Scott's figured out about his parentage somehow. She tells him to delete the call, and GG's like, "Here we go."

Serena texts Lily, who's grinning down at Jenny and the gays gobbling balls in the age-old family fun game Hungry Hungry Hippos, which maybe Nate Archibald would enjoy after the age of six but that's it, and Lily gets the message -- that she's en route to Spain, so suck it -- and feels dreadful. Blair and Nate are still kissing at the duck pond, and then it cuts to Chuck in his Burberry pajamas, looking over at Vanessa who is totally putting her dress back on from last night. Awesome! Looking delightsome and sleepy, he congratulates her on trying to sneak out before he wakes up, and she's like, "This never happened, and I am filthy now in my soul, so you can't tell anybody." He kisses her, as long as they're keeping secrets, and she is helpless before his charms, and even GG is like, "Don't do it, Vanessa!" But she totally says her lie again from last night -- "This is just between us. It means nothing?" -- only now she's hoping it's true. Nothing means anything. That wasn't the Blair he wanted. He agrees, and they are surprisingly sweet together, and the music goes dissonant and wild. XOXO, and I'll see you in two weeks.

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Gossip Girl




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