Serena: "Bart! Congratz. Listen, Lily wanted me to tell you that she's sorry she can't be here, but hopefully you'll be in jail before she comes back so you can attack her physically again."
Bart: "I don't care. I fuck demons. I fuck the Red Priestess until shadow creatures come out of her nethers. I don't need your mom for that."
Serena: "Whoa, check out that slideshow! It's that incredibly important and damning photograph somebody gave Chuck where you're ... walking into a building."
Bart: "And as usual, I will now go ass-crazy about it even though it is a banal photograph containing no actual information."

He doesn't get too far, though.

Georgina: "Program for the evening? It really sets off your skull face and made-from-real-human-skin complexion."
Bart: "Well, thank you. It's actually kinda hard to look this much like a dead person given unnatural life."
Georgina: "You'll especially enjoy the double-page spread that is just pictures of horses."
Bart: "And as usual, I will now go ass-crazy about the existence of horses. Man, why did I ever commission that oil painting of a horse I murdered? I don't know who you are, but I am very mad at you. Who else has seen this banal program containing no information?"
Georgina: "Nobody! Actually everybody."
Bart: "Good one."
Georgina: "You should have seen me back when this show was good. I was like, actually Loki. Like, from mythology."

This whole time, Sage keeps dialing Bart from Bruce Caplan's phone, which somehow she has gotten ahold of. You know, the phone of the guy that drowned to death. Sage, she'll just be headin' down into international waters, full fathom five. Strap on a snorkel. Grab a dead dude's phone. Stick that mother in a jar of rice 'til it dries out, call you up on it.

MOTY

Serena is talking to some guy, and the "oh hell no" face he makes when Dan walks up is priceless. Like even rando extras know it's about to get bullshitty.

Serena: "Surprise, surprise. Here for Daddy Trout, your new boyfriend and mentor?"
Dan: "Yeah, but also to spout more mindless nonsense about how you suck and that means I'm awesome for loving you."
Serena: "Keep it coming, idiot."
Dan: "Well, one thing that's stupid is your plan of running away to LA."
Serena, verbatim: "You can just as easily write despicable things about me from afar!"