From afar, she says. Serena, Serena Serena SERENA.
Dan: "Despicable things from afar or from anear, they are only a fraction of the nonstop creepy unending obsessive writing I do about you."
Serena: "Yeah, you wrote like one pussy thing about me one time? The rest of it is Sabrina in Inside, who was a turbo slut on drugs, and Serena in Inside Out, who is if possible even more of a goddamn mess..."
Dan: "But you are a goddamn mess, Serena. You're the worst person I've ever met in my entire life. Why won't you love me for constantly saying these things?"
Serena: "What's stupid is how you don't understand that even me moving to LA is still all about you. That's what's stupid. That's what is truly stupid, about our entire storyline this season."
Dan: "Flatterer! Just stand still while I heap yet more horrible abuse on your soul!"
Serena: "No, I have to go be my singularly unhelpful self with Blair's thing. Maybe make some weather with my hair or whatever goes on with that whole deal. There's a hammer, I know that..."
Bart: "No big deal, but could you get somebody to murder like every early-twenties girl in this entire place? They're conspiring against me in a way that embarrasses us all."
Caterer: "I'm just a caterer, though."
Bart: "I'm Bart Bass. Look at my skull face. Look into my skellington eyeballs. It's them or you."
This is my favorite one. Ivy wanders up with a tray of drinks and, instead of napkins, plenty of copies of the Very Important Envelope.
Ivy: "Cocktail, sir? We have a lovely Sudanese vodka..."
Bart: "Oh my God, what are you even doing on this show? And why do you have all these copies of the Very Important Envelope?"
Ivy: "To freak you out! One of them may even contain copies of the Boring Documents!"
Bart: "Seriously? I do not have time for this elaborate shit!"
I like Season Five of Buffy, it's my second favorite, but goddamn did I hate it when they did this same thing on that finale. "Oh, all these random things from random episodes? Oh, like this hammer that suddenly we're saying can kill God? Oh, and like a necklace or something? WHAT A PLAN! It's so fucking deep if you think about it, I mean wow, can you guys believe how tightly plotted this shit was? If we keep saying it, maybe you'll believe that shit!"