Serena is at van der Bilt HQ, begging for a job as Press Liaison or something that draws on her five minutes' experience of "event planning, writing press releases..." and generally acting like Serena. It's the last thing that's the clincher. Tripp gives her the job immediately, barely even looking up, and she can't really believe her luck, but it's S so she finds a way to believe her luck. They talk about their childhood growing up and the scar on her wrist from "the potato sack race incident of '98" at Nate's Hampton's house, and they are easy and fun together. He is going to end up in the Hudson and there is not a hero in the UES hoaxy enough to fish him out again.

She excuses herself for the D&M dinner, which she's hosting, and he goes, "Well, we're here all day every day. But I'll see you Monday?" I love that. She thanks him for the interview and for their talk on election night about her stupid problems, and... The boy is so gone. That scary look in his eyes! Anyway, she leaves, and this aide appears and makes sure we understand that that job Tripp just interviewed S for, he actually just invented. Ugh, and he's political so you know the sex is going to be weird.

At the Bleecker, "Bows And Arrows" by Immoor is playing ("I followed every instruction to a tee/ But still somehow when I look in the mirror/ I still don't see me.../ I think I've found a reason to get out/ But how can I trust my best intentions?"). Olivia is kidding, but not really, when she asks if you can "get brain damage from learning too much too fast." Ask me again at the end of the episode. So they're talking about how "real" it is to be cramming for exams when those Bleecker nerds from the Masters Of The Universe society come running over, led by the hot one. The one that did A Few Good Men with Jensen Ackles and whose genius sister was the best thing about Best Week Ever, Bruce Rauch. Tim. Timmmm. You'll get it eventually.

"Please tell me that Guinevere will use the Unholy Grail to free Lancelot from Arthur's eternal torture?!" Tim shrieks -- and don't these movies sound more and more interesting every week? -- and of course Vanessa is all the fuck over it. She jaws emptily at Olivia's face for awhile, and O laughs and says that Endless Knights IV is not actually happening, and tells the nerds they're the same rumors as usual, even though one nerd says there was a WB press release about it, and Tim yells, "I'll never trust Harry Knowles again!" She apologizes to them and they slump off ("weird," she says, which it is, but also you're in the Bleecker) and then she checks her phone... Where there are a billion missed calls. In her absence Vanessa assures Dan it won't happen, then bershons furiously and hilariously at her textbook: "Though it would be kinda awesome." Vanessa writes fanfic and not the sad dumb kind but the sad dumb scary kind. The kind where Snape fucks Harry Potter. In his butthole.