Great American Road Trip
Vegas Baby

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Sara M: D | Grade It Now!
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Vegas Crybaby

The Cootes have to beat the Pollards' time to escape the bottom two. They have a strategy in place: Keith lays the pipes out and plans where they all go while the girls assemble them and Jake "stages material," whatever that means. Even Jake doesn't seem to know what it means. But they don't need him or the girl because it's all Jennifer and Keith working together because winning without your kids is better than losing with them. Reno narrates the action lamely as the time ticks down. They're on the last piece when Jennifer looks up at the Pollards who smile back to destroy the Cootes' spirits. She thinks they lost to the Pollards as the balloon inflates and time stops at 19:07. The Cootes are all devastated, thinking this is a losing time, and I enjoy watching their misery. But it doesn't last long as Reno reveals that they won yet again. Frowns from the Pollards and the DiSalvatores, who are now just as bad at losing as the Cootes are at winning. And then Reno reveals ... that no one is going home at all because they're going to Vegas. Oh, shit. So there's yet another week of this show to watch? I was really hoping it was over next week. Instead of an End-of-the-Road challenge, the Cootes and Pollards are competing to win a night in Vegas where they'll be treated like "high-rollers." Except not so much their children, since they aren't old enough to do anything that makes Vegas fun. Amie is looking forward to the challenge so she can use her tired "kick some Cootie Booty" slogan again, as if she has ever kicked any Cootie Booty. She hasn't. The Cootes always beat her. They beat everyone. THEY CRUSH ALL OPPONENTS.

The Cootes climb aboard their RV with another crown. Jake wants to win even more crowns for everyone in the family, including Grandma. I got an e-mail from that grandma, and she doesn't strike me as the kind of person who would want a crown due to a complete and total lack of a sense of humor. Jennifer once again loves the feeling of the other families' jealousy.

Reno is back in his fake RV. He tells us the families are heading to Vegas and some hotel theatre, which I'm sure is very classy. The Cootes prepare themselves to beat the Pollards once again. In their RV, the Pollards say absolutely nothing new about the Cootes and it's getting really old. The RVs arrive in Vegas, and Silvio loves the fake New York skyline of New York New York Hotel and Casino and says he feels like he's home. Amie unfortunately describes the hotel they're headed towards as "that colored one." With that Southern accent of hers, it sounds like she's talking about something very different.

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Great American Road Trip

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