Dr. Hahn and Burke are arguing about whose patient is sicker. Her guy's on a dobutamine drip; Denny's got an LVAD. Who will win? Burke says her guy can climb Mount Shasta on a dobutamine drip. We pull back and see that they're in a conference room, on a call to UNOS. The voice on the phone announces that, as of this morning, Dr. Hahn's patient was twenty-two hundredths of a point ahead of Dr. Burke's. Burke says that's a virtual tie. The voice then says that Dr. Hahn's patient was admitted into the program before Mr. Duquette. Burke asks how long. The voice on the phone: "Seventeen seconds." Oh my God, that's the same amount of time as the title of this episode! Do you think it's a coincidence? Dr. Hahn says it might as well be seventeen weeks. Burke's phone rings, and he slides it over to Alex to answer. It's Izzie, calling to check up on the heart recovery. Alex says Burke is "working on it." Izzie takes this to mean that Burke is operating. Alex explains what's going on with the donors, and says that the higher guy gets the heart. Those good old dramatic drum beats start up. Izzie starts to look a little frantic, only a glimmer of the crazy that's to come, and blurts, "Denny's getting sicker. He's getting worse by the second. His sats are in the eighties! No, they're in the seventies, and dropping!" Alex gently tells her that he's not going to lie for her. Izzie: "Then put Burke on the phone."
Addison, looking for Alex, asks Mere if she's seen him. Mere says she has, but it was hours ago. Addie stands there, hesitant, then apologizes and says she's having a little trouble. She needs to ask Meredith something, and what she needs to ask isn't something she's even sure she wants the answer to. She hems and haws and finally comes out with it: "Are you sleeping with my husband?" Mere answers truthfully, "Not since I knew he was married." Addie, visibly relieved, says okay. But wait, there's more! Now Addie wants to know why everything seemed so weird in the vet's office that morning. "It felt a little bit like you two were having...a lover's quarrel?" Mere says no, they're not -- she's moved on, to dating Finn. It takes about half a second for Addison to understand what's happening, and it shows on her face about half a second after that. Mere understands too, and says, "Addison." Addie says no, no, thanks, she's great.
Burke's on the phone with Izzie. "Flash pulmonary edema?" he asks. "Is the LVAD working?" Izzie says it is, absolutely. Burke asks about a nitro drip and Denny's pressure. Izzie, standing in the hall and not anywhere near Denny's room or, you know, monitors, lies that it's still dropping. Burke gives her instructions, and tells her not to hang up. Burke addresses the room and the disembodied person on the conference phone: "According to my intern, Denny Duquette is now a 1-A candidate for that heart. That puts him ahead of Dr. Hahn's patient." Dr. Hahn stands up angrily and says she's outta here, that this is crap. Disembodied Voice pipes up and tells Dr. Hahn that if Burke wants to run labs on his patient to assess his status, they'll allow it. Dr. Hahn says that will take an hour. DV confirms that the donor is stable, then tells Burke that he's got an hour to get the tests done. Burke gets back on the phone with Izzie, who says she heard. "Good," says Burke. "Get going with that." Izzie hangs up the phone, freaking OUT. Eeeeee! Izzie, you FOOL. Commercials.
Kendra's surgery isn't going well. McDreamy sees that she's brain-dead, and there's nothing they can do now. Cut to him telling Kendra's parents that their daughter has no brain activity and isn't going to wake up. Fun for the whole family! They ask about the baby. McDreamy says as far as they can tell, the baby's fine, but...uh, that's not the point. "Essentially, your daughter is dead. We need your consent to remove her from life support." Kendra's dad asks if the baby could live if they kept Kendra alive. George says, with all due respect, they don't want to do that. Kendra's dad gets upset and asks George if he's part of this family, and if he has a daughter. "If you don't, you really ought to just shut up." George shuts up.
Oy, it's Brad again. "Even with all of these cuts, I don't even feel any pain. I swear, I have the highest pain threshold of anybody I know!" Hipster looks over with so much hatred and tells Bailey, "Gaaah! If I could just say something to that guy and not get fired..." Bailey says he can't fire her, and walks right over to the unsuspecting Brad, who doesn't realize he's about to get a double dose of Bailey. She tells them that she is happy for him that he's not feeling much pain from his "very minor" injuries, but there are a great many people in this hospital in a great amount of pain. "They have bullets in their bones. In their chests. In their brains. Bullets! From a gun that was aiming for you! And although they can't say it, because you're the boss of them? Most of these people at this moment are praying. Not that they'll live, not that the pain will subside. They're praying -- TO GOD! -- for you, at this moment, to shut the heck up!" Bailey turns on her heel and walks out, as Hipster mouths a "thank you" to her. She stops long enough to say, "No problem," then continues on her awesome, awesome way.
Cristina and Meredith are sitting on a gurney complaining about the jerks in their lives. Cristina can't believe that Burke chose Alex when she, his girlfriend, was standing right there. Mere complains that McDreamy just sat there talking about putting Doc down, when all McVet was doing was trying to save his life! They exchange sadnesses until Izzie walks over and tries to articulate what she's done. She stutters out that she told a lie to Dr. Burke. Cristina: "Good for you. Fight the power!" Hee. Izzie says no, she needs them to help her think, because she doesn't know what to do. "What do I do?! There's this guy ahead of Denny on the transplant list!!!" She appears, if it is not obvious to you, to be seriously losing her mind. Mere tries to console her, saying that Denny will get the next heart. Izzie yells, "NO! He needs to get this heart!" Cristina, talking to Izzie like she's four years old, says that as long as Denny is doing well, he's not going to jump ahead of anybody on the transplant list. Izzie takes a moment to compose herself, realizing she's going to get no help from these two, and lies, "Yes. You're right. Thank you." Izzie nutsily starts rooting around for supplies, and wheels some huge contraption out of the room with her. Cristina tells Mere under her breath that if she was gonna pick someone to shoot up the place, it'd definitely be Izzie. Mere: "Totally."
Denny looks on in wonder as Izzie wheels the machinery over to his bedside. He jokes that he didn't know they did transplants right inside your room. Izzie has to tell him about the situation at Mercy West, and his mood darkens considerably. "So this isn't gonna happen. Again." Izzie: "Not necessarily." She then starts babbling that she's been over this and over this, and it can't be a lie, but it can't be fake. They need charts, and tests, and for UNOS to believe them. "It HAS to be real." Izzie is in no position to discern between real and not-real at this moment, but she soldiers on with her crazy. Denny's like, "Who in the what now?" Izzie sits down on the bed (someone call Bailey, she's broken rule #2!) and tells him that in order for him to get the heart, he would have to get much worse, and very quickly. Denny says he doesn't see that happening, does she? Izzie sets her jaw. "I am going to make it happen." You know what's next -- drum beats! Commercials.
Burke and Alex wait at Mercy West for Izzie's call. It's been thirty minutes, and Burke is getting worried. He asks Alex if he called Bailey; Alex