Bailey takes her kids to the on-call room and tells them that the attendings hog it all the time and that they should sleep when they can, where they can. Which brings her to rule number three: Don't wake her unless their patient is actually dying. Rule number four, of course, is that the dying patient better not be dead when she gets there. Meredith tentatively raises her hand and brings up that Bailey mentioned five rules, not four. Bailey's beeper goes off and she said, "Rule number five: when I move, you move." They all traipse off after her as she runs toward the ER.
Bailey and the Fab Four meet a landing helicopter that contains one Katie Bryce, a young girl with seizures. Once in the hospital room, the interns muck about with poor Katie as Bailey barks orders at them. She finally stops seizing and Dr. Preston "I am Preston Burke, dammit!" Burke enters the room and tells Bailey that they need to "shotgun" Katie. That's rather harsh, don't you think? The girl's just having seizures, after all; no need to shoot the poor thing. Oh, silly me. "Shotgun" refers to giving a patient the full battery of tests that a hospital can give: CT, CBC, chem-7, tox screen, hibbity-jibbity, blue point oysters, whocka-whocka, Cuba Libra.
Bailey orders Cristina to be on labs and George to be on patient work-ups. Meredith gets the unenviable task of taking Katie to get a CT scan. "She's your responsibility now," snaps Bailey. "Wh-what about me?" asks Izzie. Bailey glances at her. "Honey? You get to do rectal exams." Hee. Bailey meant what she said about sucking up. As the delightful strains of Jem play across the soundtrack, we glimpse Izzie slathering her fingers with KY, Cristina sneaking a peak at a surgery and Bailey discovering Cristina sneaking the peak. Bailey throws open the door and demands to know what Cristina's doing there and she just says that Katie's labs came out fine and she thought Bailey would want to know. Bailey's like, uh-huh. Thanks. Fuck off. Before Bailey can shut the door in her face, Cristina mentions the rumor she heard about the attending on-call letting an intern perform a procedure during the first shift. Bailey stares at her. "I'm just...saying...it's what I heard," says Cristina. "Get away. Now!" snaps Bailey. Hee.