Meredith enters Katie's OR, and Shepherd says that it's a beautiful night to save lives so let's get in there and have some fun! Meredith's voice-over says that she can't think of any one reason why she'd want to be a surgeon, but she can think of a thousand reasons why she should quit. We get a bit of a music/voice-over montage of all the interns as Meredith continues, saying that they make it hard on purpose because there are lives in their hands. "There comes a moment when it's more than just a game," says the voice-over. "And you either take a step forward or turn around and walk away." Shepherd beckons her over, and she takes that step forward and moves to the microscope to work on Katie's aneurysm. "I could quit, but here's the thing," her voice-over continues, "I love the playing field."
Hour Forty-Eight. Cristina flies out of the OR and sees Meredith sitting outside. She compliments her on the surgery and then sits down next to her. "We don't have to do that thing where I say something and then you say something," says Cristina, "and then somebody cries and then there's a moment--" "Yuck," says Meredith. "Good," says Cristina. Heh. She tells Meredith to get some sleep because she looks like shit. Hee. She walks off, and then Derek exits the OR. Meredith looks at him lustily. Or maybe she's just squinting. I can't tell. She tells him that the surgery was amazing, and he smiles at her. She goes on to say that you practice and observe and you think you're going to know what it feels like to stand over that table but...it's so much more of a high than she was expecting. He considers her for a moment. "I don't know why anybody does drugs," she says. "Yeah," he says, clearly undressing her with his eyes. "Yeah," she says, clearly enjoying it. "I'll see you around," he says with a smile as he goes off to talk to the parents. "See you around," she says. "See you." Hee.
"So," says Meredith's voice-over, "I made it through my first shift. We all did. The other interns are all good people. You'd like them. I think. I don't know, maybe. I like them." We see Meredith entering a building and talking to a nurse. Then we hear Meredith saying that she's not going to sell the house, that she's going to keep it, and she's talking to a woman who's sitting in front of a window with a blank expression on her face. "Are you the doctor?" the woman asks. "No," says Meredith gently. "I'm not your doctor, but I am a doctor." "What's your name?" asks the woman. "It's me, Mom. Meredith." "All right," says her mother, twisting her watch. "I used to be a doctor, I think." Meredith grabs her hand and says, "You were a doctor, Mom. You were a surgeon."